White Flags? Seriously WTF!?!

[bookelly]

Browns to pass out white flags to those masochists attending the Browns/Shittsburg game. That's just about the stupidest thing I've ever...



Taking odds at how many get thrown at SHUR. +/- 40,000.

[motherscratcher]

Actually I thought it sounded appropriate.

[LakeErieWarriors]

This is terrific. My first Browns steelers game where towels of 2 different colors will irritate the piss out of me each and every time I'm whapped in the face.

[FUDU]

Little late for white flags isn't it, I mean we usually surrender in week 7 no?

[LakeErieWarriors]

Not to split hairs here because I hate these stupid towels, no matter what the sports setting. But white flags?!

Decision Maker Guy: "I know orange makes sense, and then maybe brown, but we've decided to go with white."

I'm no economist or overseas cloth distributor, but I'm thinkin that white is the cheapest. There we go, I answered my own question.

It's still fuckin stupid.

[leadpipe]

To be fair, it's toughest competition in the promotional meeting was "Another poster of a shitty player," or the "TJ WARD Helmet to Helmet Bobble head."

[swerb]

This just about says it all for the Randy Lerner era. What's next week? Broken mirror giveaways?

Even Ten Cent Beer night thinks this is a bad idea.

[LarsHancock]

#PromotionsIfIRanTheBrowns

Turkey Jones Thanksgiving concussion glasses. When worn, these visually warped glasses give you headaches and the feelings of nausea that Terry Bradshaw has to this very day from Turkey Jones' hit.

Brandon Weeden cane day. Browns fans 40 and older get a cane with fellow senior citizen Brandon Weeden's head carved into the handle and the words GET OFF MY LAWN emblazed into the shaft. Can be reversed to use as a shillelagh if someone is waving a towel around you.

Megaphone day. Free 200 decibel megaphone to anyone wearing Browns' colors that blows above .10 BAC at the gate. Yeah, there are going to be 40,000 inbred fans in our stadium again, but we give a few hundred of these bastards out to the drunks and you'll think we actually give a crap about our team once again. Comes with air horn feature to use when the Steelers' kicker is trying FGs.

Flaming bag of poop day. Fans in the first 10 rows behind the visitors bench get a kerosene-soaked lunch bag filled with dog crap, and a Cleveland Browns commemorative Bic lighter.

Energizer Wrist Rocket day. Free wrist rocket slingshot and 24-pack of AA batteries for everyone in the dog pound.

Roofie Day. Steelers fans get a free, um, energy drink as they enter the stadium. Yes, it's an energy drink, really. Drink it, it is delicious.

Ben Roethlisberger Rape Whistles. A free whistle for all the ladies with a rape prevention guide (well, a picture of Ben with a warning "do not drink near this asshole"). We wouldn't blow the whistles at inopportune times, would we? No.....

You Decide the Coach Day. Browns fans get a ballot to be filled out at the beginning of the game "Do we fire Shurmur? Pick one _ YES _YES". If "YES" the coach gets fired at halftime and a fan at random is selected to coach the second half. Couldn't be worse!

[Fire Marshall Bill 2.0]

This is quite simply the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard of at a NFL football game...

Already being a national laffingstock isn't enuff...?

IMO its well past the time for Jimmy to make an impact statement...time is of the essence, Jimbo and if you want 'me' to wait till next yr for you to do more than curse and bitch on TV, go fuck yourself,,,,, make a fucking decision....on something, anyfuckingthing for crise-sakes

Stupid is as stupid does .....and as stupid permits

[swerb]

What I want to see is Haslam and those two handlers that flank him in his suite in a steel cage match against Lerner.

[municipalmutt]

This just about says it all for the Randy Lerner era. What's next week? Broken mirror giveaways?

Even Ten Cent Beer night thinks this is a bad idea.

I always wanted to see them combine bat day with ten cent beer night as a double header.
Oh the humanity.

[Hikohadon]

Flag twirling in general is as retarded as it gets.

But Browns fans waving white flags has a kind of poetry to it.

No self-respecting Browns fan will wave a towel of any kind, but if ya hafta be that moron that does it, might as well be for surrender.

[LakeErieWarriors]

NO GO ON THE WHITE FLAGS


‏@MaryKayCabot 48m Statement from #Browns spokesman Neal Gulkis on canceling the white flag giveaway: "intended to be fun for our fans and something that...''

@MaryKayCabot 47m "..they could rally around, and we regret that some didn't perceive it that way.want to thank all of our fans for their tremendous support''

[justmebd]

NO GO ON THE WHITE FLAGS


‏@MaryKayCabot 48m Statement from #Browns spokesman Neal Gulkis on canceling the white flag giveaway: "intended to be fun for our fans and something that...''

@MaryKayCabot 47m "..they could rally around, and we regret that some didn't perceive it that way.want to thank all of our fans for their tremendous support''

I want to know how ANYONE could've taken this promotion any other way.

Scene: Randy Lerner's Office, Late Spring:
LERNER: Boys, I'm gonna be outta here in a few months, but it seems we still have to put together some promotions for the upcoming season since whoever buys this team will come in too late to do anything.

PR GUY: Sir, we do have an idea about a giveaway for the Steelers game involving a "counter" to the Terrible Towel, something with the Browns logo on it.

LERNER: Sounds good, now let's move on to what I'm gonna do as soon as I get my billion or so dollars. I gotta put some cash in to an account for my soccer team, that's my No. 1 priority.

PR GUY: What kind of design should we have on the flag, sir?

LERNER: (Clearly no longer listening) That soccer team o' mine is my pride and joy and I gotta find a way to whitewash the last few years that weren't so good. I can't be accused of being an inattentive owner over in England, that just won't stand. Hmmm, whitewash, now that gives me an idea.

PR GUY: So you want a white flag, sir? Really?

LERNER: (Still clearly not listening as he puts on his ascot and scarf) Yes!! White is a wonderful color. I think my soccer team will have . . . 50 Shades of White!! Yes, let's take advantage of a good marketing opportunity!!

PR GUY: Sir, I don't think white is the best color for this particular promotion.

LERNER: WHITE, I tell you!! That colore represents a NEW beginning. It's a clean slate, which is what I'll have with all this money I'll be getting for the team soon.

PR GUY: (Defeated) Yes, sir.

END SCENE

SCENE TWO: Six Months Later, Jimmy Haslem's Office.

Haslem: (Looking over Pittsburgh Game Promotion of White Flag) . . . The Fuck is this?

[Hikohadon]

I do like how Randy refers to it as a "colore".

[justmebd]

I do like how Randy refers to it as a "colore".

A spelling error that somehow made it funnier.

I should have found a way for Randy to refer to a "Harbour" or something like that.

[Hikohadon]

I do like how Randy refers to it as a "colore".

A spelling error that somehow made it funnier.

I should have found a way for Randy to refer to a "Harbour" or something like that.

Yeah, I was wondering why you didn't go "colour" rather than "colore".

[Bayou Tribe]

Strange/coincidental that this happened on the same weekend, but the givaway at the Superdome yesterday was white, "Go Saints" flags. I was oblivious to it for a little while, until I saw my buddy sitting back in pregame shaking his head. Poor choice, indeed.