Out of Bounds: New TCF Column

[FUDU]

I agree with mo that it is hard not to respect Steve Perry and Journey, but it is real easy to not respect Sammy Hagar.

You know, somewhere out therenis anlist of the bestnLive albums of all time. Sitting at the top ofthat list is probably Nirvana Unplugged in NY. But not not as far down that list as you'd like to believe you would find Van Halen Right Here Right Now. With Hagar.

I'm going to cut the grass. I think I just figurednout what to listen to.

*fuck typing on an iPad. That is too many typos to correct. You can all read it.

Dude 1984 is better than anything Hagar ever did.

Yeah, you heard me.

[pod2dawg]

Van Halen / Van Halen rocks.

Steve Perry, freakish talent.

Hagar? Better known for "Cabo Wabo" in Cabo San Lucas...Insane fun...well, if you enjoy good food, good music, good tequilla, and lots of touristy chicks walkin around in their I wanna be in a video outfit.

Neal Schon ......well seriously undermined his credibility when he hooked up with that now divorced crazy blonde wanna be that got in trouble for crashing a party at the White House with her just as crazy ex-husband.

Best live album? "It's Alive!"......Ramones

[motherscratcher]

If only we were all as cool and worldly as you e0y

[Cerebral_DownTime]

Lars, what kind of sick Nazi invented the nick tie?

[pod2dawg]

Lars, Is there ever a socially accepted ,or time at all where wearing a bow tie is OK?

pods uncle

[That_Guy™]

Lars, Is there ever a socially accepted ,or time at all where wearing a bow tie is OK?

pods uncle

[googleeph2]

Lars, what do you hand out to kids on Halloween?

[FUDU]

First off, suck it mo.

Secondly,

Think about if you do the opposite. Your son grows up knowing that you saved his life and killed 100 people as a result of it. You’re in jail as a result of this, and he is growing up fatherless and racked with guilt. Remember the first and last scene from Saving Private Ryan, where the now-old Ryan visits the grave of Tom Hanks’ John Miller. 50 years later, he is haunted by Miller’s last words “earn this.” He’s still racked with guilt that ten men died to save his life, and he has doubted his whole life that he was worthy of such a sacrifice. That torture is what you give your son by saving his life, and that is an extremely heavy burden for any man to bear. I wouldn’t wish that albatross on my worst enemy, let alone my most loved ones.

By the way, in this hypothetical situation, things are clearly my fault here. He’s obviously visiting me at work, and I am obviously negligent in his care and monitoring in allowing this to happen. An analogous scenario can happen at any time to a parent who has neglected their primary duties to steward their progeny responsibly and diligently, and parents can’t harm or blame society for their negligence. And while the situations of daily life aren’t ever as severe as your question, even the most minor of parental neglect can cause societal damage if not addressed properly and proactively. It makes me sad, and angry, to see parents abdicate their duties as easily as they often do…

I just can't agree that it's an easy choice. Sitting in front of your laptop with some funky new beer and extravagant meal you put together from scratch in your own home sure it is, in real time with real feelings and memories not so much. Also I'm just not so sure you would go to jail. You'd go to trial for sure but there is a legit chance a jury of your peers could exonerate you. Plus your son would know you did that to give him a chance at a full life, that's pretty tough to top in terms of fatherly love. Tough thing to live with regardless of choice, I agree.

[LarsHancock]

It would be hard to pull the switch, but the correct answer is morally easy.



What makes a man great is their courage to do something painful for the greater good. Most men don't have the conviction to do this, and most people would probably take the protection of their family over the hundreds who would die. But that is morally wrong on every account, especially because it was likely your neglect that caused the situation in the first place. Mature responsibility for your failures and a brave accepting of the consequences.

If one of these feckless douches running for president demonstrated a quarter of such courage and conviction of character I'd vote for him. But they don't, instead preferring to lie and to exchange immature barbs and misrepresentations about each other to win. Fuck them both, vote for Lars.

[e0y2e3]

I forgot you are a shameless Treckie/Star Wars douche.

There is no limit to the fantastic of your douche.

[LarsHancock]

I forgot you are a shameless Treckie/Star Wars douche.

There is no limit to the fantastic of your douche.

I'll accept the second barb but not the first. The clip was for comedic sarcasm, and I am not a "trekkie" or "Star Wars douche". I've seen most of the films and the show, but I don't have a single piece of Star Wars or Star Trek crap in my home, save the lightsabers my kids got as a birthday present last year. Which are pretty badass btw.

Don't have to be a hardcore fan in order to know pop culture...

[FUDU]

Well I disagree about the absolute morality in the situation and won't bother with the assumed responsibility part of the equation you presented. In real time I don't think but a handful of people on the planet would reason it that way so quickly, and you're not one of them, I know b/c I met you.

[peeker643]

Those 100 people are dying.

[FUDU]

Those 100 people are dying.

But what if it was a train from say Boston, and you knew somebody on it?

[LarsHancock]

Those 100 people are dying.

But what if it was a train from say Boston, and you knew somebody on it?

Then it would be murder

[motherscratcher]

In truth Lars doesn't have to do shit except take a verbal beat down from his supervisor for fucking up the schedule. Nobody is going to die. You guys don't think there's some kind of failsafe in case Lars has a coronary at his post or is in the crapper rubbing one out to the Victorias Secret catalog? It's 2012 dudes. My old man has that shit on his WW2 era O-Guage Lionel train set in case the drawbridge doesn't open.

[motherscratcher]

Also Lars, your Van Halen ranking was right on. Good job dud. With one exception, FUCK is vastly underrated and you should give it another
Iisten. I'm not putting it in the rarified air of 1984 or 5150, but it is certainly better than Balance.

[Hikohadon]

Kid playing on the RR tracks? Social Darwinism. Doesn't matter if it's your kid, no reason to sacrifice innocents for someone that's obviously underbright.

Plus, you save yourself college tuition (as if the retard was gonna go to college anyway).

[FUDU]

Those 100 people are dying.

But what if it was a train from say Boston, and you knew somebody on it?

Then it would be murder

I still don't think you'd get convicted, at least not around these parts.

[LarsHancock]

Also Lars, your Van Halen ranking was right on. Good job dud. With one exception, FUCK is vastly underrated and you should give it another
Iisten. I'm not putting it in the rarified air of 1984 or 5150, but it is certainly better than Balance.

Ugh.

The flagbearer of that shit sandwich (minus asian slaw, bacon, and bourbon bbq sauce) was Right Now, which is the anthem played to open every lame corporate event since 1991. Woo! We're fired up now! Let's sell us some fucking widgets bitches!!!

Seriously, if you told me that Sammy Hagar had recorded the album as the front man of Winger, I'd say "sounds about right". Everything is predictable, boring, and overdone, with no originality, innovation, or musical utility. Completely forgettable and banal offering with no sense of chemistry throughout.

I stand behind the placement.

[motherscratcher]

Also Lars, your Van Halen ranking was right on. Good job dud. With one exception, FUCK is vastly underrated and you should give it another
Iisten. I'm not putting it in the rarified air of 1984 or 5150, but it is certainly better than Balance.

Ugh.

The flagbearer of that shit sandwich (minus asian slaw, bacon, and bourbon bbq sauce) was Right Now, which is the anthem played to open every lame corporate event since 1991. Woo! We're fired up now! Let's sell us some fucking widgets bitches!!!

Seriously, if you told me that Sammy Hagar had recorded the album as the front man of Winger, I'd say "sounds about right". Everything is predictable, boring, and overdone, with no originality, innovation, or musical utility. Completely forgettable and banal offering with no sense of chemistry throughout.

I stand behind the placement.

Eddie played guitar with a power drill.

[FUDU]

[motherscratcher]

Thats what I'm talking about. The Red Fuckin' Rocker.

[FUDU]

Just remember you are comparing Hagar to this:

[pod2dawg]

I forgot you are a shameless Treckie/Star Wars douche.

There is no limit to the fantastic of your douche.

http://movies.yahoo.com/blogs/movie-tal ... ache=clear

[e0y2e3]

So, Lars, I have a question:

Deodorant.... I quit wearing it about a year ago. I shower 2-3 times a day so I never smell bad and I find it fairly pointless unless I am pretending to lift weights while sweating.

I do keep two sticks in my office and three at home, because sometimes you feel like you need to freshen up.

Your feelings? Tell me I am wrong and that deodorant shouldn't just be an "I drank too much and smell frisky" application/cover device?

[pod2dawg]

Lars,

I am just a simpleton with less than 4 years coaching experience back in the day, BUT if you were say offensive co-ordinator for the Browns and vs. Colts & you identified a less than fleet footed safety (Tom Zbikowski) would you not have game planned to isolate him and game plan a passing scheme to exploit his lack of speed?

thanks! pods uncle

[pod2dawg]

Lars,

Since Ohio has been right on the last 18 elections in picking the President, would it not be more prudent to just limit the entire election process to Ohio ?

Thanks!- pod

[FUDU]

Lars,

You don't give the impression that you are overly materialistic, but you are human, so what is your materialistic unicorn?

[justmebd]

With Halloween approaching, which franchise has had the best run of sequels. You could even rank them if you'd like. This is something I could talk about and debate for an entire weekend, that's just how much of a film geek I can be.

Your obvious choices (In no particular order):
1. Halloween Franchise
2. Nightmare on Elm Street
3. Friday the 13th
4. Chucky
5. Lars' Choice

[Hikohadon]

With Halloween approaching, which franchise has had the best run of sequels. You could even rank them if you'd like. This is something I could talk about and debate for an entire weekend, that's just how much of a film geek I can be.

Your obvious choices (In no particular order):
1. Halloween Franchise
2. Nightmare on Elm Street
3. Friday the 13th
4. Chucky
5. Lars' Choice

Evil Dead.

[Cerebral_DownTime]

With Halloween approaching, which franchise has had the best run of sequels. You could even rank them if you'd like. This is something I could talk about and debate for an entire weekend, that's just how much of a film geek I can be.

Your obvious choices (In no particular order):
1. Halloween Franchise
2. Nightmare on Elm Street
3. Friday the 13th
4. Chucky
5. Lars' Choice

Evil Dead.

Evil Dead II isn't really a sequel, is it? AoD was, and fucking fantastic too.


Lars, Freddy, Jason, or Michael? Which killer is the best?

[Hikohadon]

With Halloween approaching, which franchise has had the best run of sequels. You could even rank them if you'd like. This is something I could talk about and debate for an entire weekend, that's just how much of a film geek I can be.

Your obvious choices (In no particular order):
1. Halloween Franchise
2. Nightmare on Elm Street
3. Friday the 13th
4. Chucky
5. Lars' Choice

Evil Dead.

Evil Dead II isn't really a sequel, is it? AoD was, and fucking fantastic too.


Lars, Freddy, Jason, or Michael? Which killer is the best?

No, ED2 is a remake, but it does have a "2" after it, so technically...

Michael is the best. Freddy is a wuss and Jason is just tired. MM has a mission and purpose to his madness.

[Cerebral_DownTime]

With Halloween approaching, which franchise has had the best run of sequels. You could even rank them if you'd like. This is something I could talk about and debate for an entire weekend, that's just how much of a film geek I can be.

Your obvious choices (In no particular order):
1. Halloween Franchise
2. Nightmare on Elm Street
3. Friday the 13th
4. Chucky
5. Lars' Choice

Evil Dead.

Evil Dead II isn't really a sequel, is it? AoD was, and fucking fantastic too.


Lars, Freddy, Jason, or Michael? Which killer is the best?

No, ED2 is a remake, but it does have a "2" after it, so technically...

Michael is the best. Freddy is a wuss and Jason is just tired. MM has a mission and purpose to his madness.

I disagree. I grew up a Freddy fan, he has personality. It may be cheesy, but he's more than a lumbering mute.

Did you ever see Rob Zombie's awful remakes of Halloween? His wife should have her vocal chords sewn shut.

[Hikohadon]

I disagree. I grew up a Freddy fan, he has personality. It may be cheesy, but he's more than a lumbering mute.

Did you ever see Rob Zombie's awful remakes of Halloween? His wife should have her vocal chords sewn shut.

I will say I was a big fan of Nightmare 3 (I think it was Dream Warriors), that was my favorite. But not scary in the slightest.

Rob Zombie's remake was decent until Michael got out of the psych ward. Then it was just downright horrific. Was the girl that played Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis in the original) his wife? Whoever she was, she was awful beyond comprehension. When you desperately hope that she's killed, the filmmaker has failed.

Usually remakes suck, although Dawn of the Dead is a notable exception.

[Cerebral_DownTime]

I disagree. I grew up a Freddy fan, he has personality. It may be cheesy, but he's more than a lumbering mute.

Did you ever see Rob Zombie's awful remakes of Halloween? His wife should have her vocal chords sewn shut.

I will say I was a big fan of Nightmare 3 (I think it was Dream Warriors), that was my favorite. But not scary in the slightest.

Rob Zombie's remake was decent until Michael got out of the psych ward. Then it was just downright horrific. Was the girl that played Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis in the original) his wife? Whoever she was, she was awful beyond comprehension. When you desperately hope that she's killed, the filmmaker has failed.

Usually remakes suck, although Dawn of the Dead is a notable exception.

His wife played Michael's mother. She was also Baby Firefly in House Of 1,000 Corpses and The Devil's Rejects.

And Dream Warriors is also my favorite NMoES. Jason Lives (part 6) is my favorite Friday flick.

[LarsHancock]

With Halloween approaching, which franchise has had the best run of sequels. You could even rank them if you'd like. This is something I could talk about and debate for an entire weekend, that's just how much of a film geek I can be.

Your obvious choices (In no particular order):
1. Halloween Franchise
2. Nightmare on Elm Street
3. Friday the 13th
4. Chucky
5. Lars' Choice

Okay, I'll give you a list in order with some needed additions.

1) Silence of the Lambs. Hannibal Lecter is as memorable of a villain as any of the above. His near super-human intellect is almost scarier than the immortality Jason, Freddy, and Michael have, and the movies themselves are well done. Make no mistake about it - when you see a man eat his own brain, you are watching a horror film.
2) Alien. You have to call these films horror flicks - what is the difference between the Alien and Frankenstein or Dracula? You are being stalked by a monster and trying to survive, and everyone but Ripley dies. These were well filmed, and totally scary.
3) The Omen. The first was good, the second scary, the third, meh. But that's the falloff we expect from these movies. That little satanic kid was a terrifying bastard that haunted my dreams as a child.
4) Friday the 13th. I think this franchise evolved the story through the sequels better than a lot of the other ones, while remaining true to its core. Transitioning the killer from the mother to Jason gave the movies a completely different feel, which was brilliant even if it did evolve the movie into something a little formula and campy.
5) Nightmare on Elm Street. Freddy was the most creative of the bad guys, and always put on a fun show. I remember watching this as a kid with a friend and his sister, and then I got a glove and some tent stakes, and, well, teenage girls screaming is funny for teenage boys.
6) Halloween. Michael was scary in his cold psychotic way. Jason was more mean, but Michael cold, and cold is scarier. Jason killed from rage, and Michael killed because he wanted to watch you die. That is much worse, which makes him the scarier of the two.
7) Saw. Mental puzzles, but got boring after the first. But a good way to respin the genre
8) Chucky. He's a fucking puppet. Come on man. Just kick him into the incinerator. You're an idiot if Chucky kills you. So weak.

Villains in order of scariest to least scary: Damien, Alien, Lecter, Michael, Freddy, Jason, Jigsaw, Chucky.

[Hikohadon]

My issue with including Hannibal is that he is not the bad guy in the first movie, and, well, he's almost too likable to be the "bad" guy.

'Course, Jason isn't the bad guy in the first Friday the 13th, and MM isn't the bad guy in Halloweed 3, so...

The first Alien is a horror movie, the second is more an action movie imho. But I think their inclusion is warranted.

The Omen is a good call, love that movie.

Scream? Liked the first one a lot, after that, forgettable. The Living Dead trilogy?

The Descent - both 1 and 2 were solid.

[Hikohadon]

I saw elsewhere that someone listed Tremors. As much as I love Tremors (haven't seen any of the sequels), it is NOT a horror movie. Comedy with giant worms? Yes.

[mattvan1]

I agree with mo that it is hard not to respect Steve Perry and Journey, but it is real easy to not respect Sammy Hagar.

You know, somewhere out therenis anlist of the bestnLive albums of all time. Sitting at the top ofthat list is probably Nirvana Unplugged in NY. But not not as far down that list as you'd like to believe you would find Van Halen Right Here Right Now. With Hagar.

There are a lot of lists. Not one has Right Here Right Now even mentioned.

[motherscratcher]

I agree with mo that it is hard not to respect Steve Perry and Journey, but it is real easy to not respect Sammy Hagar.

You know, somewhere out therenis anlist of the bestnLive albums of all time. Sitting at the top ofthat list is probably Nirvana Unplugged in NY. But not not as far down that list as you'd like to believe you would find Van Halen Right Here Right Now. With Hagar.

There are a lot of lists. Not one has Right Here Right Now even mentioned.

I thought it was pretty clear that "somewhere out there" meant "inside my head". It's my list and I'll put Van Halen's live album any damn place I want. Because it's fucking awesome.

Now go listen to Fampton Comes Alive. I'm sure it's on some of the ones you googled.


Edit to add: and don't you dare face palm me again, bitch. If you do consequences will never be the same.

[LarsHancock]

My issue with including Hannibal is that he is not the bad guy in the first movie, and, well, he's almost too likable to be the "bad" guy.

'Course, Jason isn't the bad guy in the first Friday the 13th, and MM isn't the bad guy in Halloweed 3, so...

The first Alien is a horror movie, the second is more an action movie imho. But I think their inclusion is warranted.

The Omen is a good call, love that movie.

Scream? Liked the first one a lot, after that, forgettable. The Living Dead trilogy?

The Descent - both 1 and 2 were solid.

Hannibal did murder two guards and cut one of their faces off in the first movie. And the guys in the ambulance. The movie was definitely about him and his mind games, which was scary. His likability adds to his evil.

Aliens was definitely more action to be sure, but it had all the elements of horror, most notably everyone dies.

Scream, Living Dead, and the Descent are noted omissions. I actually considered Scream, but then forgot to write it up. And Tremors as a horror movie? Heck, it has all the elements, even if it is campy.

[motherscratcher]

I disagree. I grew up a Freddy fan, he has personality. It may be cheesy, but he's more than a lumbering mute.

Did you ever see Rob Zombie's awful remakes of Halloween? His wife should have her vocal chords sewn shut.

I agree. I love Freddie. Dream Warrior might be my favorite horror movie of all time. I'm not saying the best, but my favorite none the less.

yeah, Rob Zombie really shit the bed with the remake/origin story, or whatever you want to call it. I only saw the first one. Big mistake to try to "explain why" MM became what he did. He had a bad home life and a slutty sister blah blah blah...bullshit.

Michael Myers is supernatural pure evil incarnate. Nothing "made" him. He just is.

[Hikohadon]

Hannibal did murder two guards and cut one of their faces off in the first movie. And the guys in the ambulance.

[LecterVoice]That is incidental.[/LecterVoice]

[Cerebral_DownTime]

My issue with including Hannibal is that he is not the bad guy in the first movie, and, well, he's almost too likable to be the "bad" guy.

'Course, Jason isn't the bad guy in the first Friday the 13th, and MM isn't the bad guy in Halloweed 3, so...

The first Alien is a horror movie, the second is more an action movie imho. But I think their inclusion is warranted.

The Omen is a good call, love that movie.

Scream? Liked the first one a lot, after that, forgettable. The Living Dead trilogy?

The Descent - both 1 and 2 were solid.

Hannibal did murder two guards and cut one of their faces off in the first movie. And the guys in the ambulance. The movie was definitely about him and his mind games, which was scary. His likability adds to his evil.

Aliens was definitely more action to be sure, but it had all the elements of horror, most notably everyone dies.

Scream, Living Dead, and the Descent are noted omissions. I actually considered Scream, but then forgot to write it up. And Tremors as a horror movie? Heck, it has all the elements, even if it is campy.

You both need to watch The Devil's Backbone by Guillermo del Toro.

[mattvan1]

I agree with mo that it is hard not to respect Steve Perry and Journey, but it is real easy to not respect Sammy Hagar.

You know, somewhere out therenis anlist of the bestnLive albums of all time. Sitting at the top ofthat list is probably Nirvana Unplugged in NY. But not not as far down that list as you'd like to believe you would find Van Halen Right Here Right Now. With Hagar.

There are a lot of lists. Not one has Right Here Right Now even mentioned.

I thought it was pretty clear that "somewhere out there" meant "inside my head". It's my list and I'll put Van Halen's live album any damn place I want. Because it's fucking awesome.

Now go listen to Fampton Comes Alive. I'm sure it's on some of the ones you googled.


Edit to add: and don't you dare face palm me again, bitch. If you do consequences will never be the same.

Man, you're kind of sensitive about your poor taste in shitty music. What other fucking awesome albums are playing inside your head? Kansas Dust in the Wind? Foreigner Double Vision? Let me guess - Duran Duran? I bet you like to hum "Hungry Like the Wolf" when you have some MILF soccer mom in the chair. Admit it.

[Hikohadon]

You both need to watch The Devil's Backbone by Guillermo del Toro.

91% on Rotten Tomatoes. Color me interested.

Maybe I'll watch it tonight after the wife drops off - she doesn't like subtitles and I assume it's in Spanish.

Another "series" - Let The Right One In and the American remake.

[motherscratcher]

Of course in like Hungry Like The Wolf. Who doesn't? Never hummed it to a milf, though. That sounds like a pretty good move.

Te only thing I like about Dust in the Wind is it's one of about 6 sounds I can play part of on a guitar.

[motherscratcher]

You both need to watch The Devil's Backbone by Guillermo del Toro.

91% on Rotten Tomatoes. Color me interested.

Maybe I'll watch it tonight after the wife drops off - she doesn't like subtitles and I assume it's in Spanish.

Another "series" - Let The Right One In and the American remake.

I did like Pans Labrynth and Hellboy. Ill put this one on the list.

[e0y2e3]

This conversation, between a bald Giant, a douche, a moron and a guy who writes about The Browns for fun is still going on?

Uhg.