Out of Bounds: New TCF Column

[LakeErieWarriors]

Before slipping into a pierogi induced coma Lars, I wanted to thank you for the recipe. My Ma (maiden name Wierzbowski), put together the first batch of non-Jaworski pierogi's that I've ever had in my life. She went the sweet potato & ricotta route on a third of them and Christ were they good. Threw at least 15 of them down. It never crossed my mind that a sweet potato pierogi combination was a viable option until reading your column. As I experience the sensation of artery clogging I am going to read up on pre-30s open heart surgery incidence rates. Then, I sleep. Thanks again.

[peeker643]

Holy Shit.

I just previewed tomorrow's OoB at the request of the author who scared me by saying this one was edgy.

I'm literally wiping tears from my face from laughing so hard and my wife thinks I'm an exponentially bigger asshole than she did half an hour ago. That's no small feat.

Oh my God.

Just tremendous. And if I die in my sleep you fucks won't get to read a word of it.

[peeker643]

Enjoy, pass it around, tweet it, do what you can if you like it to spread it to others because the man is excellent.

http://bit.ly/yIBhqb

[FUDU]

Appreciate the response Lars, even if you kind of sort of used my own input in your answer.

[jb]

Lars - could you please settle the east side / west side debate for us once and for all?

[Cerebral_DownTime]

Lars - could you please settle the east side / west side debate for us once and for all?

Why pick sides? Just move to the center.

[peeker643]

Another reason Friday's are the best of the five work days: http://bit.ly/wPpVGf

[pod2dawg]

Lars,
Cialis, Viagra, or Yohimbe root?

thanks,
my uncle

[peeker643]

Dear Lars:

Last Friday night Jason Whitlock tweeted the following about Jeremy Lin, the Knicks Asian-American phenom:

Jason Whitlock @WhitlockJason
Some lucky lady in NYC is gonna feel a couple inches of pain tonight.

How come Jason Whitlock's fat ass wasn't fired for that racially motivated tweet and where do Al Sharpton and the Reverend Jackson stand on all of this? I have not heard them speak passionately on this as of yet.

[peeker643]

This guy is my newest literary hero. Screw Clancy and King and all the others. Lars brings it every week and you won't find a better column anywhere in the country much less in Cleveland:

http://bit.ly/yiOS5R

[jb]

This guy is my newest literary hero. Screw Clancy and King and all the others. Lars brings it every week and you won't find a better column anywhere in the country much less in Cleveland:

http://bit.ly/yiOS5R

Did he answer the question for you sufficiently so you don't ask the same question over nd over whenever a brother writes or says something inane and double-standard about race? No more Jimmy Stewart meets Allan Bakke posts from now on from you?

[e0y2e3]

Lars was only 40% right on the Whitlock response, solid work as always though.

[HoodooMan]

Dear Lars,

Which is your preferred backhanded compliment: "solid, 40% correct work" or "better than Clancy & King"?

[peeker643]

This guy is my newest literary hero. Screw Clancy and King and all the others. Lars brings it every week and you won't find a better column anywhere in the country much less in Cleveland:

http://bit.ly/yiOS5R

Did he answer the question for you sufficiently so you don't ask the same question over nd over whenever a brother writes or says something inane and double-standard about race? No more Jimmy Stewart meets Allan Bakke posts from now on from you?

The fact he answered that at all separates him from everyone else. The answer to that somewhat rhetorical question was irrelevant (if not true).

[peeker643]

Dear Lars,

Which is your preferred backhanded compliment: "solid, 40% correct work" or "better than Clancy & King"?

Just so we're clear, I was talking about Sam Clancy and Andre King.

[LarsHancock]

Dear Lars,

Which is your preferred backhanded compliment: "solid, 40% correct work" or "better than Clancy & King"?

if e0y2e3 says I'm 40% right, that's 39% higher than anyone else has scored on anything ever. That's like 57 sigmas outside normal - high praise indeed.

[SoulDawg74]

Holy Shit.

I just previewed tomorrow's OoB at the request of the author who scared me by saying this one was edgy.

I'm literally wiping tears from my face from laughing so hard and my wife thinks I'm an exponentially bigger asshole than she did half an hour ago. That's no small feat.

Oh my God.

Just tremendous. And if I die in my sleep you fucks won't get to read a word of it.

SD:

Don't get cocky or i'll go thru your wallet when your dead and show the wife that fifty she doen't know about and tell her how you been holding out all along. :}

SoulDawg

[peeker643]

Holy Shit.

I just previewed tomorrow's OoB at the request of the author who scared me by saying this one was edgy.

I'm literally wiping tears from my face from laughing so hard and my wife thinks I'm an exponentially bigger asshole than she did half an hour ago. That's no small feat.

Oh my God.

Just tremendous. And if I die in my sleep you fucks won't get to read a word of it.

SD:

Don't get cocky or i'll go thru your wallet when your dead and show the wife that fifty she doen't know about and tell her how you been holding out all along. :}

SoulDawg

She knows I'm poor. She's been with me since 4/20/85 and legally since 5/19/90.

She found every fifty I ever made and knows all the hiding spots inside and outside that wallet.

And no. To answer the next logical question: She's neither deaf, dumb or blind and is suffering from no cognitive deficits we're aware of.

[googleeph2]

Dear Lars:

Last Friday night Jason Whitlock tweeted the following about Jeremy Lin, the Knicks Asian-American phenom:

Jason Whitlock @WhitlockJason
Some lucky lady in NYC is gonna feel a couple inches of pain tonight.

How come Jason Whitlock's fat ass wasn't fired for that racially motivated tweet and where do Al Sharpton and the Reverend Jackson stand on all of this? I have not heard them speak passionately on this as of yet.

They are consulting with the feminists as to how they 'responded' to Bill Clinton's use of power/stature in his various relationships with women through the years.


btw, very nice, Lars.

[SoulDawg74]

Holy Shit.

I just previewed tomorrow's OoB at the request of the author who scared me by saying this one was edgy.

I'm literally wiping tears from my face from laughing so hard and my wife thinks I'm an exponentially bigger asshole than she did half an hour ago. That's no small feat.

Oh my God.

Just tremendous. And if I die in my sleep you fucks won't get to read a word of it.

SD:

Don't get cocky or i'll go thru your wallet when your dead and show the wife that fifty she doen't know about and tell her how you been holding out all along. :}

SoulDawg

She knows I'm poor. She's been with me since 4/20/85 and legally since 5/19/90.

She found every fifty I ever made and knows all the hiding spots inside and outside that wallet.

And no. To answer the next logical question: She's neither deaf, dumb or blind and is suffering from no cognitive deficits we're aware of.

SD:

Egads man , your telling me she still keeps you around even though she knows your dirty little secrets





.....insert picture of man watching wife smashing Foster can on her forehead watching Browns Game here ____ .


KEEPER !


SoulDawg

[e0y2e3]

And she isn't blind from the glare of his forehead!!!

[SoulDawg74]

Dear Lars,

Which is your preferred backhanded compliment: "solid, 40% correct work" or "better than Clancy & King"?

if e0y2e3 says I'm 40% right, that's 39% higher than anyone else has scored on anything ever. That's like 57 sigmas outside normal - high praise indeed.

SD:

Actually your both wrong Whitlock is just a big Phat opportunstic asshole who would sell his momma for a story who just happens to be Black .

If he was white he'd just be a bigger asshole who would sell his own momma for a story but probably worth more money .


Sharpton and Jackson are necessary evils so long as we have O reily's david Dukes and Rupert Murdochs slanting the world view .

No sense in ignorance racisim bigotry and stoopidity being hoarded by any one group .

Balance above all.


SoulDawg

[LarsHancock]

Dear Lars,

Which is your preferred backhanded compliment: "solid, 40% correct work" or "better than Clancy & King"?

if e0y2e3 says I'm 40% right, that's 39% higher than anyone else has scored on anything ever. That's like 57 sigmas outside normal - high praise indeed.

SD:

Actually your both wrong Whitlock is just a big Phat opportunstic asshole who would sell his momma for a story who just happens to be Black .

If he was white he'd just be a bigger asshole who would sell his own momma for a story but probably worth more money .


Sharpton and Jackson are necessary evils so long as we have O reily's david Dukes and Rupert Murdochs slanting the world view .

No sense in ignorance racisim bigotry and stoopidity being hoarded by any one group .

Balance above all.


SoulDawg

Whitlock's race is indeed irrelevant to his ignorance and bigotry, but it *may be* relevant to why he still has a job after a blatantly racist remark and half-hearted shit apology.

David Duke is irrelevant as well. He is shunned by most sentient whites because he's a feeble minded bigot. But where he has voice and following is largely amplified as a reaction to the "necessary evils" visible figures like Sharpton and Jackson perpetrate. White people don't like being unfairly discriminated against and vilified en masse any more than black people do, so the more either side shouts that inane bullshit, the stronger the counter-response in the other race will be. ALL races owe it to the good of mankind to shut the voices of intolerance within their ranks in order to prevent this action-reaction cycle from degenerating into a race-based civil war. Jackson was a great man as he stood behind Dr. King to deliver true legal equal rights to every race and creed. He just lost this idealism and became an opportunist that fans the flames of hate for profit, and that is absolutely not what America needs to heal our racial wounds.

O'Reilly is a masturbatory egotistical blowhard of an idiot, but he doesn't race bait. Murdoch doesn't race bait either. While they may be pundits for the right, suggesting the whole of the right is racist is disingenuous and serves only to deepen the racial divide. Ron Paul is a racist psychopath, and a lot of his followers are indeed racist. And it is shameful how much attention he gets, which just goes to show how far we need to come.

The first step is to remove the strong voices from each side, and eliminate the need to counterbalance bigotry.

You are right, bigotry and stupidity aren't hoarded in any one group. There is a balance. It is the responsibility of each group to eliminate its own fringe, so everyone can come closer to the middle and achieve harmony with balance.

[e0y2e3]

Tribalism

[SoulDawg74]

Dear Lars,

Which is your preferred backhanded compliment: "solid, 40% correct work" or "better than Clancy & King"?

if e0y2e3 says I'm 40% right, that's 39% higher than anyone else has scored on anything ever. That's like 57 sigmas outside normal - high praise indeed.

SD:

Actually your both wrong Whitlock is just a big Phat opportunstic asshole who would sell his momma for a story who just happens to be Black .

If he was white he'd just be a bigger asshole who would sell his own momma for a story but probably worth more money .


Sharpton and Jackson are necessary evils so long as we have O reily's david Dukes and Rupert Murdochs slanting the world view .

No sense in ignorance racisim bigotry and stoopidity being hoarded by any one group .

Balance above all.


SoulDawg

Whitlock's race is indeed irrelevant to his ignorance and bigotry, but it *may be* relevant to why he still has a job after a blatantly racist remark and half-hearted shit apology.

David Duke is irrelevant as well. He is shunned by most sentient whites because he's a feeble minded bigot. But where he has voice and following is largely amplified as a reaction to the "necessary evils" visible figures like Sharpton and Jackson perpetrate. White people don't like being unfairly discriminated against and vilified en masse any more than black people do, so the more either side shouts that inane bullshit, the stronger the counter-response in the other race will be. ALL races owe it to the good of mankind to shut the voices of intolerance within their ranks in order to prevent this action-reaction cycle from degenerating into a race-based civil war. Jackson was a great man as he stood behind Dr. King to deliver true legal equal rights to every race and creed. He just lost this idealism and became an opportunist that fans the flames of hate for profit, and that is absolutely not what America needs to heal our racial wounds.

O'Reilly is a masturbatory egotistical blowhard of an idiot, but he doesn't race bait. Murdoch doesn't race bait either. While they may be pundits for the right, suggesting the whole of the right is racist is disingenuous and serves only to deepen the racial divide. Ron Paul is a racist psychopath, and a lot of his followers are indeed racist. And it is shameful how much attention he gets, which just goes to show how far we need to come.

The first step is to remove the strong voices from each side, and eliminate the need to counterbalance bigotry.

You are right, bigotry and stupidity aren't hoarded in any one group. There is a balance. It is the responsibility of each group to eliminate its own fringe, so everyone can come closer to the middle and achieve harmony with balance.

SD:

One day when we're all in heaven my brother , but until that day we all have work to do .

Its the way the lord wants it , as it was he who scattered us all from the tower of babal to speak a million diffeent dialects and come in a trilion different sizes and shapes with ten times as many agendas .

Growth thru conflict has been mans plaight ever sense , going hand in hand with death and the tax man .

Inevetabaly we shall adapt and learn to live together or we shall all be consummed .


SoulDawg

[peeker643]

Tribalism

I don't get this.

It's tribalism if I find what Jason Whitlock says and does daily, and gets away with, to be ridiculous. Is it tribalism that I think the same about Michael Reghi and Kenny Roda or The Bull and the Fox?

They suck. I don't know how they get away with sucking either.

Whitlock didn't get fired because he's black (and maybe because these things shouldn't necessarily be taken so seriously- but white dude woulda been gone). I don't really know why Roda and Reghi don't get fired either.

I agree with Lars. And I find it refreshing it can be addressed (at this second) here without it degenerating into something ugly.

[Hikohadon]

Tribalism

I don't get this.

It's tribalism if I find what Jason Whitlock says and does daily, and gets away with, to be ridiculous. Is it tribalism that I think the same about Michael Reghi and Kenny Roda or The Bull and the Fox?

They suck. I don't know how they get away with sucking either.

Whitlock didn't get fired because he's black (and maybe because these things shouldn't necessarily be taken so seriously- but white dude woulda been gone). I don't really know why Roda and Reghi don't get fired either.

I agree with Lars. And I find it refreshing it can be addressed (at this second) here without it degenerating into something ugly.

The Bull is about the only guy on the radio in town I can listen to.

[e0y2e3]

I wasn't calling you out, I was just saying that the discussion of race cannot exist without a discussion of tribalism and tribalism cannot simply be ignored as Lars pretends is possible

You reacting to Whitlock, that isn't tribal anything, that is calling a spade a spade

[peeker643]

I wasn't calling you out, I was just saying that the discussion of race cannot exist without a discussion of tribalism and tribalism cannot simply be ignored as Lars pretends is possible

You reacting to Whitlock, that isn't tribal anything, that is calling a spade a spade

I know you weren't calling me out specifically. But I'm not sure you can ever have an open conversation about this stuff (and this is truly about as close as we've come) without the Tribalism thing being able to be floated out there.

My issue is it could effectively be the queen of spades in any conversation and kill the hand.

It's an inherent part of all of us. From the beginning of time. But moving beyond that is what's necessary and the first step is to not be afraid of it or take it as a personal attack.

Not saying you are, just saying in general. There are fucking inuits, Indian Tribes, Irish and croats who think members outside their immediate village are lesser because of location/proximity. You can really get microscopic on it.

I know it's there and that it influences us. But reasonable people who arent looking to grab headlines, power and money should be able to get past that.

[e0y2e3]

You hit on the key though, acknowledging the existence is the first step in overcoming (and the step Lars missed).

[LarsHancock]

So when arguing "tribalism" are you saying humans have no ability to control their inner animal instincts, or that people of different races inherently can't coexist and form a "tribe"? Polygamy, rape, thievery, and murder are all innate to our inner being - are you saying we are helpless to control those things, and therefore any attempt at civilization is inherently folly?

The only way to stop racism is for everyone not to tolerate racism in any way. Everyone. Period. No excuses.

Yes, there's a long way to go. But having societal rules that tolerate racism in minority communities doesn't help solve the problem, rather, it exacerbates it. And that is my point.

[e0y2e3]

Agree, my only thing is the first step is acknowledging one's own actions that are tribally divisive in their most intrinsic state, until everyone SEES what they do that is wrong they cannot refuse to tolerate their own actions, let alone those around them.

You both are right, but you're both about six steps ahead of where we are. We are inbetween not dropping the N-Bomb anymore and still defining people by the color of their skin almost instantly.

[jb]

I wasn't calling you out, I was just saying that the discussion of race cannot exist without a discussion of tribalism and tribalism cannot simply be ignored as Lars pretends is possible

You reacting to Whitlock, that isn't tribal anything, that is calling a spade a spade

^^^ You can't say that (the last part). The rest you can cause you learned it is Soc class at an elite eastern university.

[peeker643]

I wasn't calling you out, I was just saying that the discussion of race cannot exist without a discussion of tribalism and tribalism cannot simply be ignored as Lars pretends is possible

You reacting to Whitlock, that isn't tribal anything, that is calling a spade a spade

^^^ You can't say that (the last part). The rest you can cause you learned it is Soc class at an elite eastern university.

Prestigious degree holders know the following:

The phrase predates the use of the word "spade" as an ethnic slur against African Americans, which was not recorded until 1928; however, in contemporary U.S. society, the idiom is often avoided due to potential confusion with the slur.[1]

Now we're cooking with gas!!!

[LarsHancock]

The original phrase is "let's call a spade a bloody shovel", which makes perfect sense as a spade is a fancy way of describing a completely pedestrian object like a shovel. Evolving to "call a spade a spade" loses this flavor which is key to the idiom, and now with the modern slur context, the idiom itself takes a whole new misinterpretation which is best avoided.

But if you go back to the original, you can still use the idiom and be okay, even if the term "spade" for a shovel has become a complete anachronism.

[Hikohadon]

Congrats Gentlemen,

Speaking for all male pink-pigmented, orange-hair-follicled, blue-eyed, 6'2, atheists with high cholesterol, a deteriorating liver, and 3 scars on their head that hated living in Miami and have been married twice and once bit an EMT who was trying to save him from choking on his own vomit, you have managed to successfully regenerate the most boring and tired topic in the history of internet forums.

Awesome.

[e0y2e3]

Congrats Gentlemen,

Speaking for all male pink-pigmented, orange-hair-follicled, blue-eyed, 6'2, atheists with high cholesterol, a deteriorating liver, and 3 scars on their head that hated living in Miami and have been married twice and once bit an EMT who was trying to save him from choking on his own vomit, you have managed to successfully regenerate the most boring and tired topic in the history of internet forums.

Awesome.

Shut up ginger

[peeker643]

Congrats Gentlemen,

Speaking for all male pink-pigmented, orange-hair-follicled, blue-eyed, 6'2, atheists with high cholesterol, a deteriorating liver, and 3 scars on their head that hated living in Miami and have been married twice and once bit an EMT who was trying to save him from choking on his own vomit, you have managed to successfully regenerate the most boring and tired topic in the history of internet forums.

Awesome.

Shovels?

[jb]

Congrats Gentlemen,

Speaking for all male pink-pigmented, orange-hair-follicled, blue-eyed, 6'2, atheists with high cholesterol, a deteriorating liver, and 3 scars on their head that hated living in Miami and have been married twice and once bit an EMT who was trying to save him from choking on his own vomit, you have managed to successfully regenerate the most boring and tired topic in the history of internet forums.

Awesome.

Shut up ginger

Lars, Ginger, Marry Ann or Jeanne? You get one on the casting couch. You also get a night out and have to talk to her. Who & why?

[jb]

Congrats Gentlemen,

Speaking for all male pink-pigmented, orange-hair-follicled, blue-eyed, 6'2, atheists with high cholesterol, a deteriorating liver, and 3 scars on their head that hated living in Miami and have been married twice and once bit an EMT who was trying to save him from choking on his own vomit, you have managed to successfully regenerate the most boring and tired topic in the history of internet forums.

Awesome.

When did this become about Couch & Holcomb?

[Hikohadon]

Congrats Gentlemen,

Speaking for all male pink-pigmented, orange-hair-follicled, blue-eyed, 6'2, atheists with high cholesterol, a deteriorating liver, and 3 scars on their head that hated living in Miami and have been married twice and once bit an EMT who was trying to save him from choking on his own vomit, you have managed to successfully regenerate the most boring and tired topic in the history of internet forums.

Awesome.

When did this become about Couch & Holcomb?

True dat.

[HoodooMan]

Lars, Ginger, Marry Ann or Jeanne? You get one on the casting couch.

Lars, easy.

[jb]

Lars, Ginger, Marry Ann or Jeanne? You get one on the casting couch.

Lars, easy.

Nice. Punctuation is fundamental. Except for me.

[jb]

The original phrase is "let's call a spade a bloody shovel", which makes perfect sense as a spade is a fancy way of describing a completely pedestrian object like a shovel. Evolving to "call a spade a spade" loses this flavor which is key to the idiom, and now with the modern slur context, the idiom itself takes a whole new misinterpretation which is best avoided.

But if you go back to the original, you can still use the idiom and be okay, even if the term "spade" for a shovel has become a complete anachronism.

Thanks Lars. What is the origin of the idiom, "A chink in the armor?"

[pod2dawg]

Lars,

How many microfracture surgeries can Greg Oden sustain?

Thanks!

Portland Front Office

[LarsHancock]

The original phrase is "let's call a spade a bloody shovel", which makes perfect sense as a spade is a fancy way of describing a completely pedestrian object like a shovel. Evolving to "call a spade a spade" loses this flavor which is key to the idiom, and now with the modern slur context, the idiom itself takes a whole new misinterpretation which is best avoided.

But if you go back to the original, you can still use the idiom and be okay, even if the term "spade" for a shovel has become a complete anachronism.

Thanks Lars. What is the origin of the idiom, "A chink in the armor?"

Pretty sure it came from when Jason Whitlock would LARP on the weekends.

[LarsHancock]

Lars,

How many microfracture surgeries can Greg Oden sustain?

Thanks!

Portland Front Office

Let's put it this way: it's a good thing for Oden Michael Jackson is dead, because Portland was considering trading his freak of a skeleton to Jackson for the rights to Billy Jean. Dude wasn't born normal, and will never be normal.

It's amazing how some draft picks are so unbelievably stupid that everyone in the world, save the GM that made them, recognizes them instantly as horrible mistakes. Oden over Durrant. Bowie over Jordan. Tristan Thompson over, fuck, anyone else. How did those picks even get made in the first place?

When the general public is smarter than you, it's time to find a new job. Or a cyanide pill.

[LarsHancock]

Lars, Ginger, Marry Ann or Jeanne? You get one on the casting couch.

Lars, easy.

I'm not that easy.






Okay, I am.

[pod2dawg]

Lars,
Could you please help clarify what the fuck a P.E.D. is? I had no idea testosterone is one. I always thought it is what made my hair fall out and rocket charged my libido.

Thanks!

pod's uncle

[LarsHancock]

A little light on questions this week - anyone got anything?