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Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

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Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby swerb » Sat Feb 24, 2007 12:26 pm

Someone just alerted me to this. Amazingly, had never heard this.

ABSOLUTELY EPIC. Lee Elia, after a loss before a crowd of 5,000 people that gave the team a 5-14 start to the 1983 Cubs season.

Makes Jim Mora and Bobby Knight seem soft.

Caution if at work, the profanity is staggering.

http://www.speakeasy.org/~bucky/lee_elia_br.mp3
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Unread postby furls » Sat Feb 24, 2007 2:07 pm

Holy fucking, cock sucking, uncle fucking, nickel-dime, unemployed, piece of monkey shit, tampon string, cunt hair, beef curtain, bastard, sumbitch....

Wow!
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Unread postby jfiling » Mon Feb 26, 2007 7:03 pm

That was as good as Lasorda ranting after some reporter asking him what he thought of Dave Kingman's performance (Kingman had just hit 3 homeruns against the Dodgers that day).

Both rants mentioned at the link below (I can't make a link for some reason).

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2004/s ... nterviews/
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Unread postby swerb » Mon Feb 26, 2007 7:48 pm

This Elia rant gets better every time I listen to it.

The best part of it is, when this went down, in '83, day baseball in Chicago was sacred. And he just unloads on it.

"85% of the world is working. The other 15% are out here. It's a fucking playground for these cocksuckers."

"I'll tell you what, I hope we get hotter than shit so I can shove it up these peoples asses. All 3,000 of them."
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Unread postby swerb » Thu Apr 12, 2007 1:12 pm

Bump this legendary rant up so it doesn't get lost ...
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby JoelHammond » Thu Apr 12, 2007 2:06 pm

Print it!
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Unread postby FUDU » Thu Apr 12, 2007 6:53 pm

Lee Elia is hands down the greatest melt down in sports history.

I agree Swerb I can listen to that everyday, actually I do, I burned it to a CD and have it in my car.
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Unread postby swerb » Thu Apr 12, 2007 10:03 pm

It just doesn't get any better than that.
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby consigliere » Thu Apr 12, 2007 10:49 pm

For whatever reason, that link does not work for me.
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Unread postby consigliere » Thu Apr 12, 2007 10:57 pm

Wow, finally got the link to work. That IS epic. Holy shit. Absolutely loved him cracking on the 3000 or so coming to "day baseball while the rest of the world had lives and jobs."

A transcript should be made of this.
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Unread postby consigliere » Thu Apr 12, 2007 11:00 pm

I found a transcript:

http://quote.webcircle.com/cgi-bin/feat ... dFeature=4

Lee Elia's 1983 Rant

From Lee Elia, Chicago Cubs, Manager, in April, 1983 (before Wrigley Field had lights for night baseball), following a home loss to the Dodgers and in front of writers and microphones:

F*ck those f*ckin' fans who come out here and say they're Cub fans that are supposed to be behind you, rippin' every f*ckin' thing you do. I'll tell you one f*ckin' thing, I hope we get f*ckin' hotter than sh*t, just to stuff it up them 3,000 f*ckin' people that show up every f*ckin' day, because if they're the real Chicago f*ckin' fans, they can kiss my f*ckin' ass right downtown and PRINT IT.

They're really, really behind you around here...my f*ckin' ass. What the f*ck am I supposed to do, go out there and let my f*ckin' players get destroyed every day and be quiet about it? For the f*ckin' nickel-dime people who turn up? The motherf*ckers don't even work. That's why they're out at the f*ckin' game. They oughta go out and get a f*ckin' job and find out what it's like to go out and earn a f*ckin' living. Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers. Rip them motherf*ckers. Rip them f*ckin' cocks*ckers like the f*ckin' players. We got guys bustin' their f*ckin' ass, and them f*ckin' people boo. And that's the Cubs? My f*ckin' ass. They talk about the great f*ckin' support the players get around here. I haven't see it this f*ckin' year. Everybody associated with this organization have been winners their whole f*ckin' life. Everybody. And the credit is not given in that respect.

Alright, they don't show because we're 5 and 14...and unfortunately, that's the criteria of them dumb fifteen motherf*ckin' percent that come out to day baseball. The other eighty-five percent are earning a living. I tell you, it'll take more than a 5 and 12 or 5 and 14 to destroy the makeup of this club. I guarantee you that. There's some f*ckin' pros out there that wanna win. But you're stuck in a f*ckin' stigma of the f*ckin' Dodgers and the Phillies and the Cardinals an all that cheap sh*t. It's unbelievable. It really is. It's a disheartening f*ckin' situation that we're in right now. Anybody who was associated with the Cub organization four or five years ago that came back and sees the multitude of progress that's been made will understand that if they're baseball people, that 5 and 14 doesn't negate all that work. We got 143 f*ckin' games left.

What I'm tryin' to say is don't rip them f*ckin' guys out there. Rip me. If you wanna rip somebody, rip my f*ckin' ass. But don't rip them f*ckin' guys 'cause they're givin' everything they can give. And right now they're tryin' to do more than God gave 'em, and that's why we make the simple mistakes. That's exactly why.
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Unread postby swerb » Thu Apr 12, 2007 11:01 pm

"The mother fuckers don't even work ... that's why they're at the game."

"It's a disheartening fucking situation we're in right now."

"Once we hit that fucking groove, it will flow. And it will flow. The talents there."
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby consigliere » Fri Apr 13, 2007 10:04 am

Good God, read this again this morning and ROTFLMAO.

They're really, really behind you around here...my f*ckin' ass. What the f*ck am I supposed to do, go out there and let my f*ckin' players get destroyed every day and be quiet about it? For the f*ckin' nickel-dime people who turn up? The motherf*ckers don't even work. That's why they're out at the f*ckin' game. They oughta go out and get a f*ckin' job and find out what it's like to go out and earn a f*ckin' living. Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
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Unread postby swerb » Fri Apr 13, 2007 10:33 am

Again, the best part about this is that when this happened, in 1983 ... day baseball was sacred in Chicago.
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby swerb » Sat May 26, 2007 8:24 pm

This just needs to be bumped every so often ...

"AND PRINT IT!!!"
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby Babrook » Sat May 26, 2007 10:32 pm

And he lost his job after that season. Go figure.
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Unread postby swerb » Thu Jun 28, 2007 8:46 am

Because I needed a laugh after a rough morning ...
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby livinthesportslife » Thu Jun 28, 2007 9:32 am

I like how he had to tell us he was frustrated at the end of all that, as if I thought he was jovial throughout the entire rant. It's priceless, and it makes my life complete.
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Unread postby tribefan333 » Thu Jun 28, 2007 4:28 pm

How did he not laugh at "85% of the world works...the other 15 come here...RIP THOSE MOTHER FUC*ERS!!!"
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Unread postby psk678 » Thu Jun 28, 2007 8:01 pm

that was priceless, this guy's my new hero.
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Unread postby swerb » Thu Aug 23, 2007 10:11 am

bump
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby bowl » Thu Aug 23, 2007 10:26 pm

I laughed
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Unread postby bigyellowbud » Fri Aug 24, 2007 12:10 am

That was as good a rant as it gets!!! My question is.....how does a reporter stand there with his microphone taking all this in and keep a straight face????? I'd be ROL!!!!!
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Unread postby Hi Oktane » Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:26 am

W.O.W.

I can't believe I'd never heard that before. How long did he keep his job after that one? Amazing how much the world has changed in 24 years....fucking cocksuckers!
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Unread postby Hi Oktane » Fri Aug 31, 2007 10:53 am

"At least the Scots didn't have to tune in with the rest of the country and watch their women get plowed by Longshanks and his men."
~Commodore Perry on the difference between baseball's flawed economics : Indians :: prima nocta : Scots
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Unread postby swerb » Fri Aug 31, 2007 10:59 am

and PRINT IT!
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby Hi Oktane » Fri Aug 31, 2007 11:02 am

"At least the Scots didn't have to tune in with the rest of the country and watch their women get plowed by Longshanks and his men."
~Commodore Perry on the difference between baseball's flawed economics : Indians :: prima nocta : Scots
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Unread postby Hi Oktane » Fri Aug 31, 2007 11:09 am

Earl Weaver, never one to be outdone...

http://www.termdictionary.com/downloads/audio/EarlWeaverTirade.mp3


If she’d get her ass outta the fuckin’ bars at night and hustlin’ around the goodamn street, she might get a prick stuck in her every once in awhile.


...Go fuck yourself, and to fuck with your show coming up next on the Baltimore Oriole Baseball Fucking Network.”
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Unread postby tzxb4v » Tue Sep 04, 2007 5:52 pm

this should be kept at the top of the list so 15% of the fucking population can fucking hear it and rip it daily.
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Unread postby FUDU » Sat Sep 08, 2007 11:10 am

In case anybody didn't hear supposedly Darko Milicic (sp) went on a rant that puts all other rants on this planet to shame, while playing some international ball.

Unfortunately he did it in his native tongue of Serbian so unless you can speak that mumble jumble you won't be able to appreciate it.

Rumor has it he went so nuts he promised, not threatened, sexual acts of misconduct toward a referee's family.
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Unread postby Birdman » Sat Sep 08, 2007 1:12 pm

Earl Weaver, never one to be outdone...

http://www.termdictionary.com/downloads ... Tirade.mp3

That was unbelievable. I can't even believe this is real. Funny as hell.
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Unread postby Madre Hill, Superstar » Sat Sep 08, 2007 5:29 pm

Nothing about Ozzie Guillen's melt the other day?

Too lazy to find an MP3, have an article instead.
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Unread postby swerb » Fri Oct 19, 2007 8:44 am

Bump this to brighten up my morning
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby drum » Fri Oct 19, 2007 8:56 am

I remember this thread.
:eek :shock:
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Unread postby bowl » Sat Dec 22, 2007 1:21 pm

classic
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Unread postby swerb » Sat Dec 22, 2007 1:37 pm

And print it!
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby Joens » Sat Dec 22, 2007 6:23 pm

haha great.


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Unread postby swerb » Mon Apr 07, 2008 10:23 am

bump
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Unread postby British_Pharaoh » Mon Apr 07, 2008 11:05 am

Larry Bowa yelling at that fool Johnny Gould was funny
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Unread postby aaronBG10 » Mon Apr 07, 2008 12:31 pm

I have listened to this rant atleast 10 times...never gets old.
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Unread postby CAVSTRIBEBROWNSin07! » Mon Apr 07, 2008 2:13 pm

Thanks for the fuckin bump, was just fuckin reading about this recently. Fuckin awesome
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Re: Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby swerb » Sun Jun 21, 2009 7:43 pm

bump
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Re: Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby NMonster » Sun Jun 21, 2009 8:53 pm

Swerb wrote:bump


Wow thanks for the bump... :D Haha this is so awesome...
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Re: Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby DrPoove » Sun Jun 21, 2009 10:14 pm

My big brother at my frat in college is from Chicago and a Cubs die hard. He had this on MP3 literally a month after MP3s were born in the late 90s. Hadn't heard it in about 10 years. Still priceless!
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Re: Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby swerb » Mon Oct 11, 2010 9:55 pm

bump
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Re: Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby RedDawg53 » Tue Oct 12, 2010 7:42 am

swerb wrote:bump


Still waiting 3 1/2 years for someone to bring up your post, swerb? lol.

I remember watching that clip on youtube a while ago. Difficult to hear what he actually says with all the bleeping. Wish Manny would show 1/10 of that kind of emotion and anger after a loss.
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Re: Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby FUDU » Sun Oct 17, 2010 6:15 pm

You kill me Rich, you're gonna bump this till the day you die aren't you.
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Re: Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby Damage » Mon Oct 18, 2010 8:19 am

I remember when Stern played this a few years ago. Brilliant
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Re: Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby OldDawg » Tue Oct 19, 2010 12:22 am

swerb wrote:Someone just alerted me to this. Amazingly, had never heard this.

ABSOLUTELY EPIC. Lee Elia, after a loss before a crowd of 5,000 people that gave the team a 5-14 start to the 1983 Cubs season.

Makes Jim Mora and Bobby Knight seem soft.

Caution if at work, the profanity is staggering.

http://www.speakeasy.org/~bucky/lee_elia_br.mp3


In case you were wondering, the Cubs finished 71-91.
So at 5-14, his Cubbies were winning at a .263 clip.
At after that start, the rest of the way they were 66-77, a .462 clip.
That's an improvement of 175%. This rant must have really rather season-changing!
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Re: Greatest Rant In Press Conference History

Unread postby swerb » Mon Dec 05, 2011 10:05 pm

bump
"It's like dating a woman who hates you so much she will never break up with you, even if you burn down the house every single autumn." ~ Chuck Klosterman on Browns fans relationship with the Browns

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Posts: 17917
Joined: Thu Jan 19, 2006 5:04 pm
Location: Twinsburg, OH
Favorite Player: Mango Hab
Least Favorite Player: Bob LaMonte

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