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No Holds Barred

Funny Stuff

Need to get something off your chest? Have a topic that doesn't fit one of the other forums? Rant away in here. Mature audiences only, not for the easily offended.

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Funny Stuff

Unread postby swerb » Tue Mar 06, 2007 6:13 pm

http://www.punny.org/money/eat-your-mon ... at-buffet/

This is classic. A column on how to get your money's worth at an all you can eat buffet.

I'd pay $39.99 pay per view to see this guy go mano y mano with Pup.
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Unread postby pup » Tue Mar 06, 2007 7:46 pm

Bring his ass on.
Home Run Leaders as RHB 5/7/13

Mark Reynolds (10)
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Unread postby Guest » Wed Apr 11, 2007 11:47 am

A guy from Cleveland dies and is sent to Hell. He had been a wicked, horrible man his entire life. The devil puts him to work breaking up rocks with a sledgehammer. To make it worse, he cranks up the temperature and the humidity. After a couple of days, the devil checks in on his victim to see if he is suffering adequately. The devil is aghast as the Clevelander is happily swinging his hammer and whistling a happy tune. The devil walks up to him and says, "I don't understand this. I've turned the heat way up, it's humid, and you're crushing rocks; why are you so happy?" The Clevelander with a big smile, looks at the devil and replies, "This is great! It reminds me of August in Cleveland . Hot, humid, a good place to work. It reminds me of home. This is fantastic!"

The devil, then extremely perplexed, walks away to ponder the Clevelander remarks. Then he decides to drop the temperature, send down a driving rain and torrential wind. Soon, Hell is a wet, muddy mess. Walking in mud up to his knees with rain blowing into his eyes, the Clevelander is happily slogging through the mud pushing a wheelbarrow full of crushed rocks. Again, the devil asks how he can be happy in such conditions. The Clevelander replies, "This is great! Just like April in Cleveland . It reminds me of home, doing yard work and gardening on the Northcoast!"

The devil is now completely baffled but more determined to make the Clevelander suffer. He makes the temperature plummet. Suddenly Hell is blanketed in snow and ice. Confident that this will surely make the Clevelander unhappy, the devil checks in on him. He is again aghast at what he sees. The Clevelander is dancing, singing, and twirling his sledgehammer as he cavorts in glee. "How can you be so happy? Don't you know its 40 below zero?" screams the devil. Jumping up and down, the Clevelander throws a snowball at the devil and yells, "Hell's frozen over! This means the Browns finally won the Super Bowl!"

Cleveland: Beautiful in it's Self-Defeated Sense of Pride.
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