Bury or cremate loved ones and yourself fellas.
http://sports.espn.go.com/boston/mlb/ne ... id=4524957
PHOENIX -- A new book by a former employee of Alcor, the company that froze Ted Williams' remains, alleges the baseball Hall of Famer's body was mistreated by the company.
Larry Johnson says in the book "Frozen: My Journey Into the World of Cryonics, Deception and Death" that he watched an Alcor official swing a monkey wrench at Williams' frozen severed head to try to remove a tuna can stuck to it. The first swing accidentally struck the head, Johnson contends, and the second knocked the tuna can loose.
Alcor Life Extension Foundation of Scottsdale, Ariz., issued a statement on its Web site denying the allegations and promising legal action.
At least they got that damned can off his head.
Which begs the obvious question as to which hump came up with the idea of fucking with the Splinter in the first case:
"Dude, screw it. I'm gonna stick this Starkist can on Teddy Ballgame's frozen dome. It'll be epic. Shit, it's fucking stuck. Where's the monkey wrench bro?"
Edit: And yeah, before there are any crocodile tears, I put this in NHB because I find it funnier than midgets and monkeys. Which are both hilarious, especially if paired together.