The run of shitty VD movie opening up

[jb]

In Seinfeld whine.... what's up with thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat.

Theres like 3, and each looks dopier than the rest. Perfect for a date with dinner at the Melting Pot.

And it hits me....

Is this a new phenominon, Mitch and others, or have I just slept through this? And can the timing be linked to internets dating and New Year's resolution. Follow me....

Lonely peeps feel like shit at the holidays. They decide they have to "meet that special someone" and are too inept to do it the old fashioned way. So they hit the internets dating sites about mid-January. They need a first date. I know, how about a cute romantic comedy?????

Or it's a double date of two straight lonely women who stuff they faces before hand at The Olive Garden.

What is the driver here?

The only people I know who are hooked up and would have to go to this crap are semi-iregular contributor Gnati and Gnati wife (or maybe he went cause back then she was Gnati girl only, I dunno )

Takes?

[e0y2e3]

Single chicks start prowling for VD lock ups in mid Jan. Ain't rocket science.

[jb]

Single chicks start prowling for VD lock ups in mid Jan. Ain't rocket science.

But dude, is there an annual run of this sap every year?

Am I just too playoff obsessed and drunk to recognize?

[e0y2e3]

Single chicks start prowling for VD lock ups in mid Jan. Ain't rocket science.

But dude, is there an annual run of this sap every year?

Am I just too playoff obsessed and drunk to recognize?

Let's put it this way, I haven't really noticed.

I do know that there are a shit ton of romantic comedies on netflix and HBO. They have to come from somewhere and my logical guess would be jan - feb is the most saturated period.

[Guest]

Single chicks start prowling for VD lock ups in mid Jan. Ain't rocket science.

But dude, is there an annual run of this sap every year?

Am I just too playoff obsessed and drunk to recognize?

Yes (to both questions )

Last year...Confessions of a Shopaholic, He's Just Not That Into You, and the worst one, Renee PotatoFac Zellwegger in "New In Town".

2008: "Definitely, Maybe" (which I got drug to see...needed to be drugged to see it), "Fools Gold", and "Over Her Dead Body".

2007: "Music and Lyrics" (another Clarissa 'favorite') and "Because I Said So".

So yeah...every year they start cranking out god-awful romantic comedies...usually in late January...and run them all the way up to Valentine's Day. "Leap Year" I think was just so exceptionally bad that they decided to dump it earlier, but then we've got "When In Rome", "Dear John", and what may be the worst (as Clarissa wants me to go) "Valentine's Day"...co-staring Taylor Swift.

[jb]

Single chicks start prowling for VD lock ups in mid Jan. Ain't rocket science.

But dude, is there an annual run of this sap every year?

Am I just too playoff obsessed and drunk to recognize?

Yes (to both questions )

Last year...Confessions of a Shopaholic, He's Just Not That Into You, and the worst one, Renee PotatoFac Zellwegger in "New In Town".

2008: "Definitely, Maybe" (which I got drug to see...needed to be drugged to see it), "Fools Gold", and "Over Her Dead Body".

2007: "Music and Lyrics" (another Clarissa 'favorite') and "Because I Said So".

So yeah...every year they start cranking out god-awful romantic comedies...usually in late January...and run them all the way up to Valentine's Day. "Leap Year" I think was just so exceptionally bad that they decided to dump it earlier, but then we've got "When In Rome", "Dear John", and what may be the worst (as Clarissa wants me to go) "Valentine's Day"...co-staring Taylor Swift.

"Valentine's day" looks like an ensemble cluster fuck of the highest proportions.

I wish taylor Swift would find Jesus and get out f performing in any way, shape or form.

But the stupid look on the female's face in the Dear John trailor is the WORST. Just look at her stupid vapid puppy wannabe pout. God, she's out-Tayloring Taylor.

It's The Notebook for 17 year olds.

Only thing that will be wore is when they do the same schtick with a pasty vampire.

My kingdom for a teleport experience back the the days of "Mad Men".

Oh, and good luck with Clarissa. Damn.

BTW - Close escape last weekend at the Redbox with the Time Traveller's Wife.

Still, undefeated.

[HoodooMan]

What's the last Jan/Feb movie of any genre that didn't suck?

Tis the season for cramming all of your studio's shitty movies into the first couple months of the year.

(Should be interesting to see if Shutter Island is an exception to the rule)

[Hi Oktane]

"Over Her Dead Body" doesn't souns s'bad..

[FUDU]

I wish taylor Swift would find Jesus

Well I was born on Christmas.

[jb]

I wish taylor Swift would find Jesus

Well I was born on Christmas.

So disappointed in you, FUDU. She's a child. Body of a 19 year old with the mind of a 15 years old.

I thought you valued more "seasoned" women?

[That_Guy™]

...She's a child. Body of a 19 year old with the mind of a 15 years old...

You say that like its a bad thing...

[jb]

...She's a child. Body of a 19 year old with the mind of a 15 years old...

You say that like its a bad thing...

Gotta talk to her sometime. doncha?

Or not I guess.

I'm done.

[mrburns]

What's the last Jan/Feb movie of any genre that didn't suck?

Tis the season for cramming all of your studio's shitty movies into the first couple months of the year.

(Should be interesting to see if Shutter Island is an exception to the rule)

Gran Torino, FTW.

[e0y2e3]

What's the last Jan/Feb movie of any genre that didn't suck?

Tis the season for cramming all of your studio's shitty movies into the first couple months of the year.

(Should be interesting to see if Shutter Island is an exception to the rule)

Fuck Shutter Island.

I hate that movie due to sheer over saturation at this point. I've never been bombarded by the same preview for damn near a year at every single movie like I have this flick. I have the freaking lines memorized at this point. They really screwed up letting said preview run for as long as they did after they pussed out of releasing in 2009.

I may wait for the DVD just out of protest.

[HoodooMan]

Gran Torino, FTW.

Disqualified.

It opened in limited release in December, in time for Award Season.

[HoodooMan]

Fuck Shutter Island.

I hate that movie due to sheer over saturation at this point. I've never been bombarded by the same preview for damn near a year at every single movie like I have this flick. I have the freaking lines memorized at this point. They really screwed up letting said preview run for as long as they did after they pussed out of releasing in 2009.

I may wait for the DVD just out of protest.

That's what you get for going to the theater more than 2-3 times a year.

[mrburns]

Gran Torino, FTW.

Disqualified.

It opened in limited release in December, in time for Award Season.

Alright, I'll play again. Taken. That was solid. Wasn't that February?

[Guest]

Gran Torino, FTW.

Disqualified.

It opened in limited release in December, in time for Award Season.

Alright, I'll play again. Taken. That was solid. Wasn't that February?

Technically...it was released on Jan. 30

Breach is the only one I'd definitely include.

Could maybe include Vantage Point and Eight Below. Not great, but didn't suck. (Eight Below made my Top 10 Guilty Pleasures for the Decade)

Other than those three...nada for the past several years that I've been tracking this.

[Lebowski]

"Valentine's day" looks like an ensemble cluster fuck of the highest proportions.

She's already planting the seed for us to see this one. Ugh.

[Cease]

Courtesy of Mike Burns, comedian

[mistero]

Supposed to see Valentines Day on Sunday. I'm thinking a bottle of valium and a 5th of Scotch should do the trick.

[Triple-S]

Courtesy of Mike Burns, comedian

I always love how they know market movies with this as "The Hangover's Bradley Cooper" and him involved in some chick flick.

In "The Hangover", I auctually thought he did very little in terms of the comedic value of the movie, it was Ed "the nard dog" Helms and Zach Galifianakis, who really made the movie do well, I felt all Cooper added was playing the straight guy mediocre to good, with a smug look on his face. Not a bad actor, but I just felt it wasn't him that made that movie, not by a longshot.

[hermanfontenot]

Female porn. Only difference between it and male porn (the good kind) is the former is socially acceptable.

[Larvell Blanks]

I always love how they know market movies with this as "The Hangover's Bradley Cooper" and him involved in some chick flick.
.

Quick, off the top of your head, name me 3 Bradley Cooper movies.....







waiting...





waiting...






now you see why they preface his name w/ "The Hangover"

[Guest]

Oh...and what they don't tell you in the ads is that Bradley Cooper is supposed to be gay in this movie. And his lover is Eric Dane.

The only thing I am grateful for this weekend is that my loving wife wants us to go out for our annual "Valentine's Day Movie That Mitch Isn't Allowed To Review"...

...and see Percy Jackson.

And you know what? There is no way I'll be able to hate that movie, for even if it's stupid, I will immediately think "She could have forced me under our agreement to see Valentine's Day". Thank you, babygeezus.

[Fire Marshall Bill]

Unless you're single and out to get laid yir a fucking hen-pecked nancy boy if you went to see any of that boo-fucking-hoo tripe

Hell, I never even heard of half of those P'sOS till they ran on Showtime or HBO. Now I get you leave my wife to watch them alone while I tune in the Military Channel or Movies That Don't Suck etc etc etc

Here's how it works 'chiles...

Spend 10 yrs denegrating V-day then one day surprise her at work with roses in a vase to make all the other women jealous

She comes home happy.

Get her cleaned up and take her out to dinner ...then home to get busy

Fuck all that movie drama shit that requires tears, conversation and meaningful fucking dialog

If it doesn't get her hot enuff to take your dick out of your pants on the ride home so you don't have to hear her talk you wasted both time and money and have given up your manhood

May as well wear pink sneakers to the theater

'juss sayin', sissies

...and here's a movie tip for every visit. Take a flask of Jack to pour into your Coke

[cozmeesah]

Ugh. You couldn't pay me to go see this movie (well... depends on how much you'd be paying) and I'm a woman.

It just looks really really bad and I thought that back when they were still filming the thing. Now I'll like a rom com if it's pretty funny, done in an at-least-kind-of-original way, and they actually make me give a crap about the characters.

For instance, I liked Notting Hill, Love Actually, The Proposal, Hitch and Runaway Bride. You guys here will probably look at those five and think " *barf* She has horrible taste in movies". But I found them funny and done at least somewhat well.

Valentine's Day seems to be the type I do not like. Cramming as many stars and clichés into 1.5-2 hours as they possibly can without any actual character development or even somewhat engaging story. It looks to me like they were trying to do the American version of Love Actually and failed miserably.

I love this quote from Roger Ebert's review of this film:

"Valentine's Day" is being marketed as a Date Movie. I think it's more of a First-Date Movie. If your date likes it, do not date that person again. And if you like it, there may not be a second date.

[jb]

:lmfao:

Unless you're single and out to get laid yir a fucking hen-pecked nancy boy if you went to see any of that boo-fucking-hoo tripe

Hell, I never even heard of half of those P'sOS till they ran on Showtime or HBO. Now I get you leave my wife to watch them alone while I tune in the Military Channel or Movies That Don't Suck etc etc etc

Here's how it works 'chiles...

Spend 10 yrs denegrating V-day then one day surprise her at work with roses in a vase to make all the other women jealous

She comes home happy.

Get her cleaned up and take her out to dinner ...then home to get busy

Fuck all that movie drama shit that requires tears, conversation and meaningful fucking dialog

If it doesn't get her hot enuff to take your dick out of your pants on the ride home so you don't have to hear her talk you wasted both time and money and have given up your manhood

May as well wear pink sneakers to the theater

'juss sayin', sissies

...and here's a movie tip for every visit. Take a flask of Jack to pour into your Coke

Rack 'em.

[jb]

Ugh. You couldn't pay me to go see this movie (well... depends on how much you'd be paying) and I'm a woman.

It just looks really really bad and I thought that back when they were still filming the thing. Now I'll like a rom com if it's pretty funny, done in an at-least-kind-of-original way, and they actually make me give a crap about the characters.

For instance, I liked Notting Hill, Love Actually, The Proposal, Hitch and Runaway Bride. You guys here will probably look at those five and think " *barf* She has horrible taste in movies". But I found them funny and done at least somewhat well.

Valentine's Day seems to be the type I do not like. Cramming as many stars and clichés into 1.5-2 hours as they possibly can without any actual character development or even somewhat engaging story. It looks to me like they were trying to do the American version of Love Actually and failed miserably.

I love this quote from Roger Ebert's review of this film:

"Valentine's Day" is being marketed as a Date Movie. I think it's more of a First-Date Movie. If your date likes it, do not date that person again. And if you like it, there may not be a second date.

I cn never understand why fat Ebert didn't have the coronary and thin Siskle did.

[Guest]

I cn never understand why fat Ebert didn't have the coronary and thin Siskle did.

Siskel died of brain cancer...but there ya go.

[Cerebral_DownTime]

Fuck this movie. We're going to see The Wolfman. I bet it's gonna suck too, but I like Werewolf movies.

[jb]

I cn never understand why fat Ebert didn't have the coronary and thin Siskle did.

Siskel died of brain cancer...but there ya go.

My bad.

Probably from all the bad VD movies.

[Fire Marshall Bill]

So, how was the movie...................................wimps?

Ya'll makin' breakfast this morning, too?

[Erie Warrior]

"Valentine's day" looks like an ensemble cluster fuck of the highest proportions.

She's already planting the seed for us to see this one. Ugh.

We went to a friend's house with a group of people last night for dinner. Plan was to hangout for a few hours, and go to see a movie with 2 other couples. Guess what movie was chosen?

I made them wait until the 9:15 showing so I could watch Wolfman at 9. Line in the sand.

[Cerebral_DownTime]

Ugh.... The Wolfman is not good. it had pontential, but they fucked it up. The effects were good, but the story was blah.

[mistero]

OK, saw it.

Here's the 30 second review.

No nudity.

In the last predictable sequence where all the predictable storylines are resolved the 48 oz diet coke caught up to me. A final scene with sydney bristo and kuutch head takes place on a bridge over a bubbling brook.

Nearly pissed myself.

[Guest]

I always love how they know market movies with this as "The Hangover's Bradley Cooper" and him involved in some chick flick.
.

Quick, off the top of your head, name me 3 Bradley Cooper movies.....







waiting...





waiting...






now you see why they preface his name w/ "The Hangover"

Well, there's Wedding Crashers.

And... uh...

To be fair, I don't watch many movies.

[HoodooMan]

Fuck Shutter Island.

I hate that movie due to sheer over saturation at this point. I've never been bombarded by the same preview for damn near a year at every single movie like I have this flick. I have the freaking lines memorized at this point. They really screwed up letting said preview run for as long as they did after they pussed out of releasing in 2009.

I may wait for the DVD just out of protest.

Looks like that might not even be necessary.

65% says this movie blows.

[mattvan1]

Fuck Shutter Island.

I hate that movie due to sheer over saturation at this point. I've never been bombarded by the same preview for damn near a year at every single movie like I have this flick. I have the freaking lines memorized at this point. They really screwed up letting said preview run for as long as they did after they pussed out of releasing in 2009.

I may wait for the DVD just out of protest.

Looks like that might not even be necessary.

65% says this movie blows.

It's the opposite. 65% fresh. But a sample size way too small (71 reviews) to draw any conclusions one way or the other.

Top critics are split 11 fresh, 8 rotten. http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/1198124-shutter_island/?critic=creamcrop&sortby=fresh&name_order=asc&view=#contentReviews

BTW, e0y2e3, it's a Paramount release produced and directed by Martin Scosese - did you think they were going to down play it?

[HoodooMan]

It's the opposite. 65% fresh.

I meant that 65% positive reviews for this movie = shitty movie.

But a sample size way too small (71 reviews) to draw any conclusions one way or the other.

Nah, once there are this many reviews, that number isn't changing more than a few points in either direction.

[Cerebral_DownTime]

lol @ people who decide on what movies to see based on Rotten Tomatoes reviews.

[e0y2e3]

BTW, e0y2e3, it's a Paramount release produced and directed by Martin Scosese - did you think they were going to down play it?

That has nothing to do w/ it. Starting the advertising campaign mad early, delaying the crap out of the movie, then keeping the advertising amped up during the entire delay is why it went from typical advertising to ridiculously annoying.

They pussed out and kept pushing it back (probably because as the reviews indicate it sucks and they knew it so they wanted to release against the remnants of Valentines day movies).

[mattvan1]

I meant that 65% positive reviews for this movie = shitty movie.

That has nothing to do w/ it. Starting the advertising campaign mad early, delaying the crap out of the movie, then keeping the advertising amped up during the entire delay is why it went from typical advertising to ridiculously annoying.

They pussed out and kept pushing it back (probably because as the reviews indicate it sucks and they knew it so they wanted to release against the remnants of Valentines day movies)

Gotcha both. Didn't know it had been delayed several times. Having read the book, I can see where it might be tough to make a film and try and stay true to the main charcater's delusions.

[Guest]

Wow...what we need is for Martin Scorsese to make an Antawn Jamison movie in 3D with James Cameron providing the technical expertise, and then we can see Eeyore's head explode (even though he has never seen Jamison play as a Cav, never seen Avatar, and never seen Shutter Island).

Seriously...there are some things to hate on before they come out. GI Joe and Transformers 2 jumps to the top of the list...but the constant "I HATE IT!!!!" before it's been seen is getting a bit ridiculous.

[e0y2e3]

I hate the over-saturation Mitch.

Great movies don't get delayed because of "marketing concerns" for six+ months though. And this movie just punished me every freaking time I went to the theaters w/ that damned trailer. It started making my head hurt. It was like American Idol.

This may be an okay movie and I'll see it. I have a lot more faith in it then Avatar. And I have no problems w/ Jamo, if you read my takes they were centered around Amare and age.

And as for Avatar, well I can go to the art museum if I want to stare at pretty things. Or I can just remember the crap that is Star Wars.

[Guest]

EVERYTHING is going to be over-saturated now. There is no way around it.

Movies are such a risk/reward investment, and now Hollywood is going to carpet bomb the airwaves for every single film that's released now, whether it's any good or not.

As long as they see potential profit margins like Avatar on one end and Paranormal Activity on the other exists, you're going to see a sickening amout of commercials for every film.

Hell, look at all the ads for that crappy Harrison Ford/Brendan Frasier movie Extraordinary Measures. Saw non-stop commercials for weeks, and then the film comes out and lays an egg to the point of making less than $12 million. No matter, we'll still see the over-exposure continue.

[e0y2e3]

Yeah but everything doesn't have over 12 months of owning all movies trailers.

The delay and the extra six months of Promos was insane. I mean I fully expect this film to be average to okay etc... I don't need to be reminded every time I watch a movie for an extra six months because they pussed out and decided they could only release it during the dregs of the film year. That is my only point. Settle down if you are going to delay six freaking months. Stop beating me on the head like this thing is coming out tomorrow.

It's just an annoyance. I'm glad I haven't hit the theaters for awhile so the memory was just starting to fade.

I'll probably be seeing The Crazies before this. Hell, it may be a wait and get feedback from peeps movie. But I will eventually see it (even if on DVD), so they win in the end.

[Cerebral_DownTime]

What a dumb take. "There's too many previews so i'm going to hate the movie without seeing it." Just take your ball and go home, brah.

[HoodooMan]

What a dumb take. "There's too many previews so i'm going to hate the movie without seeing it." Just take your ball and go home, brah.

Worse than, "LOL @ people who don't waste their time seeing shitty movies just to know for certain that they're shitty?" ; )