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Eat, Drink, & Be Merry

Holes in Your Game?

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Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby mattvan1 » Sun Feb 22, 2009 11:57 pm

Any part of cooking or meal prep that you just have never seemed to master? I can chop, dice, julienne, saute, bake, roast, boil, reduce, braise, grill, smoke.....but I cannot deep fry something to save my mother-effing life. Tried fried chicken this evening. I mean, how hard can it be? Everything was great - brined, buttermilked, seasoned, breaded, great color and flavor. Except for that under cooked meat on the inside/chicken sushi thing which was, shall we say, a bit unappealing. WTF?

Misery loves company, so sharing your most horrific abject failures would cheer me up. Thanks in advance.
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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby waborat » Mon Feb 23, 2009 12:03 am

As far as that bird goes? Get that earl hot, hot, hot.....I get it around 425+ and let it swim for 7-8 minutes


My problem has always been poached eggs...don't ask me why, but the friggin things either get undercooked, overcooked or break open every time....I am embarrassed that I have to call my wife into the kitchen everytime when it comes time to make them :thud:

Also, I can't make bakery worth a damn either...God, I swear you have to take an estrogen pill before you can get that chit right?
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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby JoJo White » Mon Feb 23, 2009 12:13 am

I'm really struggling with cooking, but I've pretty much mastered that eating & drinking thing.
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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby 4thQtrGlory » Mon Feb 23, 2009 12:18 am

ive never deep fried anything, mostly because its gross. Im lousy at the egg thing too. Unless their scrambled, im in trouble.
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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby FUDU » Mon Feb 23, 2009 12:24 am

You gimme a box a some directions and I am unstoppable.

Thanks St. Ed's.
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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby Cerebral_DownTime » Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:11 am

My wife makes killer pan fired chicken. I tried once while she was out of town. I had the same undercooked problems.

One time I was drunk and put a DiGiorno pizza in the over and fell asleep, good thing we had smoke detectors.

:hic:
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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby Stu » Wed Feb 25, 2009 9:31 pm

deep fried oreos FTMFW Yo!

pancake batter, coat, drop, flip, dry off, enjoy.
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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby General » Thu Feb 26, 2009 12:02 pm

Cerebral_DownTime wrote:My wife makes killer pan fired chicken. I tried once while she was out of town. I had the same undercooked problems.

One time I was drunk and put a DiGiorno pizza in the over and fell asleep, good thing we had smoke detectors.

:hic:


Drunk cooking was and will always be a shortcoming. Panfried some Italian sausage years ago, passed out at kitchen table, created a cloud deck in the house to rival Katrina. Lot's of yelling from my mother.

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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby Ziner » Thu Feb 26, 2009 12:06 pm

General wrote:
Cerebral_DownTime wrote:My wife makes killer pan fired chicken. I tried once while she was out of town. I had the same undercooked problems.

One time I was drunk and put a DiGiorno pizza in the over and fell asleep, good thing we had smoke detectors.

:hic:


Drunk cooking was and will always be a shortcoming. Panfried some Italian sausage years ago, passed out at kitchen table, created a cloud deck in the house to rival Katrina. Lot's of yelling from my mother.

:spanky:


Frozen Pizza is my devil. Always have to have it when drunk and always burn the shit out of it. You'd think I'd wake up with that oven timer, but at least the secondary one (smoke alarm) wakes me up.

However some of my best ideas have come when drunk while cooking. Grilled hotdogs on frozen pizza was pretty tasty, but Totino's pizza rolls smothered in ranch dressing is out of this world.
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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby jfiling » Sun Mar 01, 2009 3:42 pm

4thQtrGlory wrote:ive never deep fried anything, mostly because its gross. Im lousy at the egg thing too. Unless their scrambled, im in trouble.

Deep frying is tough to do at home. You can buy a fryer, or you can use a cast iron vessel. The key to making fried food not be gross is to have the oil stay at a hot enough temperature so that the pressure of the steam leaving the food prevents the oil from penetrating it. Anyone who wants to fry food properly, whether it's french fries or meat like chicken, has to have two items. The most important is a 12 inch cast iron skillet, and the second is a cast iron dutch oven in the 5 quart range. A fry thermometer and good oil is essential as well, because old oil or oil with too low of a smoke point will make nasty fried foods. Good fried foods are neither greasy nor undercooked.
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Re: Holes in Your Game?

Unread postby 4thQtrGlory » Sun Mar 01, 2009 3:47 pm

Ziner wrote:
General wrote:
Cerebral_DownTime wrote:My wife makes killer pan fired chicken. I tried once while she was out of town. I had the same undercooked problems.

One time I was drunk and put a DiGiorno pizza in the over and fell asleep, good thing we had smoke detectors.

:hic:


Drunk cooking was and will always be a shortcoming. Panfried some Italian sausage years ago, passed out at kitchen table, created a cloud deck in the house to rival Katrina. Lot's of yelling from my mother.

:spanky:


Frozen Pizza is my devil. Always have to have it when drunk and always burn the shit out of it. You'd think I'd wake up with that oven timer, but at least the secondary one (smoke alarm) wakes me up.

However some of my best ideas have come when drunk while cooking. Grilled hotdogs on frozen pizza was pretty tasty, but Totino's pizza rolls smothered in ranch dressing is out of this world.


Totino's pizza rolls and ranch ARE the best snack EVER! Also, a great "drunk snack" is Speedway gas station Chili Dogs with Nacho cheese on top. Mmmmmm
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