Week 1: Browns vs Eagles

[drum]

Shurmur would kick the field goal here.
Edit: now he's challenging? wtf is he challenging? damn he is a dumbass

[bookelly]

SHUR just challenged Vick into a first down.

[Noodle]

NO! Not more typical Cleveland Heartbreak!!

[drum]

classic Browns. Jesus Christ

[Hikohadon]

Who didn't see this coming?

No way in fuck Weeden gets it done here.

[Pabo]

Typical fucking Browns.

[fairvis]

Fort squeezes that, the game still wouldn't have been over... Philly has 3 TOs... let's get Cribbs to get a good return here!

[drum]

if they can just get close Dawson is money

[Noodle]

Shit!

Well, that's that. Thanks for coming.

[yogi]

35 yards gives Dawson a 52 yard attempt

[drum]

Hahaha, oh FFS.
Philly literally could not have done more to give the Browns this game and they blew it.

[fairvis]

Fuck Weeden already. Shit.

[Noodle]

Hahaha, oh FFS.
Philly literally could not have done more to give the Browns this game and they blew it.

I think this is the first time EVER a team has been as penalized as the Eagles and they still win.

Glad to know that it could happen against the Browns.

[Noodle]

Fuck Weeden already. Shit.

Get ready to draft another QB. Should of sold the effin' farm for RG3. Look at his stats today.

[drum]

Our D is solid. Philly is a very good offense.

/Curious why we didn't go for 2? Oh yay...SHUR.

Yep, my 1 year old son has bigger balls. A team like this needs calls like going for two, going for it on fourth down once in a while. Show the team you believe in them.
Shurmur won't go on fourth unless they are hopelessly down with 1 minute left. Pisses me off to no end

also, I want that point now.

[Hikohadon]

Fuck Weeden already. Shit.

Get ready to draft another QB. Should of sold the effin' farm for RG3. Look at his stats today.

Stop with that noise already. They tried to sell the farm but lost out on a blind auction.

[Noodle]

Fuck Weeden already. Shit.

Get ready to draft another QB. Should of sold the effin' farm for RG3. Look at his stats today.

Stop with that noise already. They tried to sell the farm but lost out on a blind auction.

How many games you gonna give him Chris before we start reading in The Outsider that he's not the guy?

[peeker643]

Fuck Weeden already. Shit.

Get ready to draft another QB. Should of sold the effin' farm for RG3. Look at his stats today.

Stop with that noise already. They tried to sell the farm but lost out on a blind auction.

How many games you gonna give him Chris before we start reading in The Outsider that he's not the guy?

'More than one' is the right response now that he's here.

Also acceptable is 'He was never the guy'.

That'll take a longer amount of time, though I'm convinced we'll inevitably get there.

Y'all can tell me til the cows come home how it was his first game and it was against the Eagles and all of that. He left 14 points on the field when he wasn't looking like a complete hack the other 98% of the time.

Maybe he got confused or the game moved faster or whatever, but he missed Massaquoi and A Smith on throws backups and 3rd stringers make. And as God is my witness, my 11-yr old questioned Shurmur's intelligence and the purity of his breeding when he decided going for two up five was not the right play.

Weeden doesn't think fast enough or move fast enough or, well,..... it was Game 1.

[Triple-S]

Fuck Weeden already. Shit.

Get ready to draft another QB. Should of sold the effin' farm for RG3. Look at his stats today.

Stop with that noise already. They tried to sell the farm but lost out on a blind auction.

A-fucking-men.

Tired of this whining bullshit.

And you're honestly telling me they'd outbid evil rich asshole Daniel Snyder after he got snubbed by Peyton Manning?

BTW, a few of those picks we didn't trade away to get RG3 were getting pressure on Vick today.

[Hikohadon]

Fuck Weeden already. Shit.

Get ready to draft another QB. Should of sold the effin' farm for RG3. Look at his stats today.

Stop with that noise already. They tried to sell the farm but lost out on a blind auction.

How many games you gonna give him Chris before we start reading in The Outsider that he's not the guy?

If he's not seriously better by Week 5 or 6, then I'll start allowing my doubts voice. I think we all knew he would struggle early. Just maybe not THAT bad, and not without glimpse of potential.

He was bad enough today that he really should've been benched, and that's not something I thought I'd ever say with Colt in the wings. But since finding out if Weeden might be the guy is what this season is about...

There's still hope he can develop at this point. He's got an ocean of room for improvement.

[jfiling]

And as God is my witness, my 11-yr old questioned Shurmur's intelligence and the purity of his breeding when he decided going for two up five was not the right play.

Weeden doesn't think fast enough or move fast enough or, well,..... it was Game 1.

A million times this. Shurmur doesn't think fast enough either, which is why he didn't go for two.

[fairvis]

I'll see how he looks against the Bengals next week. Hopefully Richardson can get a little bit more room. Philly looked like they knew the playcalls, outside of that reverse. But seriously... 12/35 for 118 yards and 4 INTs.

Tannehill didn't do much better though... 20/36 for 209, 0 TDs, 3 INTs.

[Hikohadon]

I'll see how he looks against the Bengals next week. Hopefully Richardson can get a little bit more room. Philly looked like they knew the playcalls, outside of that reverse. But seriously... 12/35 for 118 yards and 4 INTs.

Tannehill didn't do much better though... 20/36 for 209, 0 TDs, 3 INTs.

That's cuz Tannehill is destined to be a bust and was from the second he was drafted that high by a team that bad.

If Weeden is like Tannehill, he'll be a disaster too.

[CAVSTRIBEBROWNSin07!]

Please don't shoot me for saying this, but this is the exact kinda game that Colt woulda won. Not advocating anything, just speakin truth.

[Hikohadon]

Please don't shoot me for saying this, but this is the exact kinda game that Colt woulda won. Not advocating anything, just speakin truth.

Maybe. But this is big-time speculation since I've seen him lose games just like this several times last year.

Losing games like this is why Weeden got drafted.

[drum]

And as God is my witness, my 11-yr old questioned Shurmur's intelligence and the purity of his breeding when he decided going for two up five was not the right play.

Weeden doesn't think fast enough or move fast enough or, well,..... it was Game 1.

A million times this. Shurmur doesn't think fast enough either, which is why he didn't go for two.

No, shurmur doesn't go for two there or ever on 4th down because he's a pussy. If he never takes the chance then the team gets the blame. If he goes for it and doesn't get it, he gets the blame.

[Erie Warrior]

If Weeden is like Tannehill, he'll be a disaster too.

If? Is any team worse than the Browns?

Colt wins this game, not because he's better than Weeden, but because he wouldn't be worse (like dividing by zero).

Did they anoint Weeden because he's 30, or because he is better? I'm not talking stronger arm, I'm saying the better player right now. Who gives the team the best chance to win, not by being good, but by being less bad.

Fantastic performance by the D. They will be on the field 3/4 of the time, so they better start conditioning for it.

I really wish they had lost by 20, some asshole somewhere will argue they have a chance.

That is a lie.

[drum]

If Weeden is like Tannehill, he'll be a disaster too.

If? Is any team worse than the Browns?

Colt wins this game, not because he's better than Weeden, but because he wouldn't be worse (like dividing by zero).

Did they anoint Weeden because he's 30, or because he is better? I'm not talking stronger arm, I'm saying the better player right now. Who gives the team the best chance to win, not by being good, but by being less bad.

Fantastic performance by the D. They will be on the field 3/4 of the time, so they better start conditioning for it.

I really wish they had lost by 20, some asshole somewhere will argue they have a chance.

That is a lie.

There is just no way you can lose a game when you receive 5 turnovers and 110 yards in penalties. That is not excusable.

Edit: At home no less

[OldDawg]

Well, I'm glad that we didn't do like the Cavs did and stretch on our picks.
We traded up a spot to get an RB thats already been hurt and averaged 2ypg, and
we drafted a solid 2nd-round 30-yr-old QB in the first round.

Now its time to tank so we can draft Barkley with the first pick and trade Colt for a 15th round pick and Weeden for an 8th round pick.

[Hikohadon]

If Weeden is like Tannehill, he'll be a disaster too.

If? Is any team worse than the Browns?

The performance of the Defense alone answers that question for you. Several teams are worse... which by no means makes them good.

[Hikohadon]

Well, I'm glad that we didn't do like the Cavs did and stretch on our picks.
We traded up a spot to get an RB thats already been hurt and averaged 2ypg, and
we drafted a solid 2nd-round 30-yr-old QB in the first round.

Now its time to tank so we can draft Barkley with the first pick and trade Colt for a 15th round pick and Weeden for an 8th round pick.

Matt Barkley is so incredibly uninteresting. Pancake bunny for the next guy that mentions his name.

[Erie Warrior]

Matt Barkley is so incredibly uninteresting. Pancake bunny for the next guy that mentions his name.

Truth. Which is why they should have packaged the 1st and 2nd this year and the 1st next year and all of their picks into antiquity for RG3.

And one solid defensive performance doesn't make them not the worst team in the league.

I guess one abysmal offensive performance doesn't make them the worst either.

History and reality does.

[Hikohadon]

Matt Barkley is so incredibly uninteresting. Pancake bunny for the next guy that mentions his name.

Truth. Which is why they should have packaged the 1st and 2nd this year and the 1st next year and all of their picks into antiquity for RG3.

And one solid defensive performance doesn't make them not the worst team in the league.

I guess one abysmal offensive performance doesn't make them the worst either.

History and reality does.

Why the fuck is it that everyone wants to re-write history with RG3? Like they just refused to offer what was required?

THEY TRIED TO GET HIM.

Dag...

[peeker643]

If Weeden is like Tannehill, he'll be a disaster too.

If? Is any team worse than the Browns?

The performance of the Defense alone answers that question for you. Several teams are worse... which by no means makes them good.

You mean up until the Eagles remembered they had LeSean McCoy and the Browns had the Browns run defense?

Andy Reid should be kicked in the balls for having 41 passes and 16 runs at one point in the game.

Absolutely fucking clueless to not find Shady earlier than your final drive of the game.

[Erie Warrior]

Why the fuck is it that everyone wants to re-write history with RG3? Like they just refused to offer what was required?

THEY TRIED TO GET HIM.

Dag...

Can't speak for others, but mine is a combination of ignorance and hops.

[Triple-S]

Why the fuck is it that everyone wants to re-write history with RG3? Like they just refused to offer what was required?

THEY TRIED TO GET HIM.

Dag...

1.) It was like it was said before, a blind auction. The Browns had no way of knowing how much was the price for the rights to RG3, had they known, I'd imagine they'd have bid even more.

2.) You're not bidding against a rational person, you're bidding against a guy that acts like the real life version of Mr. Burns. No price was too high for this asshole. The Browns would have had to put up the Rock N' Roll hall of fame, and the rights to sell only budweiser at the games, and they'd have still come up short with what Snyder was willing to pitch out.

http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/arti ... an-snyder/

3.) Did anyone else notice Tannehill's stats for the afternoon? Luck's?

[Hikohadon]

If Weeden is like Tannehill, he'll be a disaster too.

If? Is any team worse than the Browns?

The performance of the Defense alone answers that question for you. Several teams are worse... which by no means makes them good.

You mean up until the Eagles remembered they had LeSean McCoy and the Browns had the Browns run defense?

Andy Reid should be kicked in the balls for having 41 passes and 16 runs at one point in the game.

Absolutely fucking clueless to not find Shady earlier than your final drive of the game.

WHICH... BY... NO... MEANS... MAKES... THEM... GOOD...

You're right about Shady. Absolutely no reason they didn't ride him the whole game.

But watch that Miami team. Defense is terrible. Slow. Old. Offensive line sucks. Tannehill is just as clueless as Weeden. Just as bad on offense but clearly worse on D.

But if everyone wants to claim the Browns are the worst team in the league, blah blah blah, whatever, far be it for me to stand in the way of good ol' fashioned self-pity.

Besides, if you're not going to be good, might as well be as bad as you can be.

[Erie Warrior]

Teddy Bridgewater for '13

[Triple-S]

Miami
Buffalo
Jacksonville
Indianapolis
Kansas City
Minnesota
St. Louis
Arizona?
Seattle?

All look pretty bad, and could be beat by the Browns any given day imo, and vice versa.

BTW, the Saints defense was ranked 24th last season, factor in the matter of Bountygate.

The Eagles were 8th.

Factor in that for both QB's performance's today.

[Hikohadon]

The positive: I don't see any way Shurmur survives this season. Not with play calling like that. Not with the results he's already earned.

Anyone got a guy they're interested in who isn't named Gruden or Cowher?

[British_Pharaoh]

Not often a guy throws 4 interceptions fumbles the ball twice (although they were recovered) and still wins

Defense was sensational; offense, abysmal


I feel this has already been said in a variety of ways already, but I wanted my annoyance recorded for posterity.

[Triple-S]

The positive: I don't see any way Shurmur survives this season. Not with play calling like that. Not with the results he's already earned.

Anyone got a guy they're interested in who isn't named Gruden or Cowher?

not exciting but, perhaps Dick Jauron with a good offensive coordinator?

don't laugh, I think he's honestly doing a great job considering what he's had to work with.

[Hikohadon]

The positive: I don't see any way Shurmur survives this season. Not with play calling like that. Not with the results he's already earned.

Anyone got a guy they're interested in who isn't named Gruden or Cowher?

not exciting but, perhaps Dick Jauron with a good offensive coordinator?

don't laugh, I think he's honestly doing a great job considering what he's had to work with.

He has, but I think his track record proves that he's a good DC, bad HC.

Really, no retreads interest me very much, but open to arguments.

[peeker643]

Besides, if you're not going to be good, might as well be as bad as you can be.

Yes- We really should try this route.

Both kicking ass and being simply 'awful' hasn't gotten it done.

You play with the self-pity jabs if you like. I really don't feel anything remotely close to pity for myself. Just disgust for this fuck-fest. But if you want to go with that oft-played straw man where others get labeled as self-pitying while the losses and INTs and retarded decisions by players and coaches continue then so be it. I'm telling you the very basic and simple truth: this run defense was horrible last season and horrible today. The quarterback they selected with a first round pick was possibly historically pathetic. I honestly cannot remember a sadder performance from the Freys, DAs, Quinns and Colts of the world. Some as bad? Maybe. None notably worse though.

I don't give a shit what it means for next year or next week. I'm not at all buoyed by the fact the defense may not be the very worst in the game. Huzzah to that! I'm telling you once again today sucked and there's a very, very good possibility that 90% of football Mondays will this fall.

But at least they did something about the QB position.

Something is all we can ask and try.

Enough somethings and maybe one day they'll be hit in the balls with the right thing.

It's just brutal. But I guess we can open the 2013 draft thread now if that's where the joy will ultimately come from.

I'm with you on Barkley. He does nothing for me. But there's a chance you'll have to do something at that spot. Might as well give him a try. If it doesn't work there's 2014.

[LakeErieWarriors]

The positive: I don't see any way Shurmur survives this season. Not with play calling like that. Not with the results he's already earned.

Anyone got a guy they're interested in who isn't named Gruden or Cowher?

^^This

Shur will be outta here on the first thing smokin after Haslam officially grabs the reins. Fatty will be gone shortly after that. At that point it will be the Haslam way or the highway, and I don't see him movin a DC to HC. He'll want and will aggressively pursue somebody solid. Of course he might not being pulling those strings, it could be our new GM.

[Hikohadon]

I'm with you on Barkley. He does nothing for me. But there's a chance you'll have to do something at that spot. Might as well give him a try. If it doesn't work there's 2014.

We'll just step by your crybaby comments about being called a crybaby...

Unless Weeden is just awful all season, there's little chance they draft a QB in the 1st anyway, but even if you do you don't re-draft Colt McCoy at the top of the 2013 draft when you could just suck with the current Colt McCoy for free. There will be better QB's than Barkley available. He's just the only one a lot of people have name recognition with.

[Hikohadon]

Both kicking ass and being simply 'awful' hasn't gotten it done.

PS - If the Browns were simply "awful" enough, Andrew Luck or RG3 would have been starting for them today.

[Hikohadon]

I'm telling you once again today sucked and there's a very, very good possibility that 90% of football Mondays will this fall.

You say that like you didn't already know it before this game.

[Fire Marshall Bill 2.0]

I've watched both USC games and Barkley has been 2 qts shy of Meh..

My guess is he spent the summer admiring himself

At least McCoy is a gamer

[googleeph2]

...At that point it will be the Haslam way or the highway, and I don't see him movin a DC to HC. He'll want and will aggressively pursue somebody solid. Of course he might not being pulling those strings, it could be our new GM.

What do people base their expectations of Haslem on? I keep asking and I never seem to figure out the answer.